TripAway2Day -- Why today?

Some more randomness...

2007-09-18T09:18:00.000-04:00

Who's going to bring "sexy" back the next time? Was it ever really gone in the first place?

I'm having an interesting time trying to balance everything in my life right now. Building a house and trying to sell a condo in this market was a horrible idea. However, I know I'll be so happy when I wake up that first morning in my new bedroom. Only one month to go!

24-year-old Asian boys with muscles tease my cock and add to the stress.

32-year-old Asian boyfriends don't tease my cock and add to the stress.

Looking forward to Ugly Betty's start-up coming soon. Not really looking forward to see how "the gays" are going to be portrayed when they move into Wisteria Lane. Jeez, gays are moving to Wisteria Lane...I wonder how stereotypical I will be when I move into MY new neighborhood.

Salvaging my friendship with Donna, but not sure how I feel about it. It's been good for me to "strengthen" my bond with Beny by not having Donna around. But, I miss her humor and insanity. I just hope that this time she will be more respectful of me.

Where are the hurricanes this year? I could use a day off of work already!

I hope he doesn't mind, but one of my favorite blogs to read is: http://manhattanoffender.typepad.com/manhattanoffender/
Check him out. He seems rather "well-grounded", but his writing and humor are sharp as a tack.

I'm really horny for college boys lately. It's been awhile.

Halloween Horror Nights is coming soon and I can't wait to step into the Carnival of Carnage! It's the best time of the year!

Season's about to change in Orlando and I'm ready for it. I've been sweating now more than ever, like Cats now and forever.

That's all, my little cuddlecunts! (Thanks, MO!)

Good Luck!

2007-08-16T11:42:00.000-04:00

Good Luck to Danny Tidwell tonight on So You Think You Can Dance!

I'll miss seeing you on my tv. :(

Best wishes, Mr. Gorgeous!

So You Think You Can Dance

2007-08-09T11:19:00.000-04:00

Oh...my...God...

...I love you, Danny! So damn zexy. Damn.

Anyway, I think Pasha's days are numbered, along with freaky smiling girl. After last nights AMAZING show, I'm looking to Danny and Sabre to be the final two. Sabre is wonderful.

But, if I had to choose from the two, I think you know who I'd pick.

Danny Danny Danny. How I lust thee!

So You Think You Can Dance

2007-07-13T10:33:00.000-04:00

I am so addicted (yet again) to So You Think You Can Dance. Funniest part is...I CAN'T dance! But, the creativity and energy of these vivacious youths is zexy and exciting for me week after week.

I'm really not at all surprised that Cedric got booted off last night. He should have been booted earlier than Jesus anyway, but I am so worried that my dear, sweet Hok will be next.

Hok has been inspriational for me from the beginning...well, actually before the beginning since he was actually in the audition phase of last season, too. Hok is a true artist. Not only is he a master of his own style of "B Boy" dancing, he plays the violin, and he paints. His sensitive nature, beautiful face, and lovely accent make we twitch each night. I want to reach into my TV and pull him out and put him in my pocket (or in my underwear).

Then, there's Danny. You know, Jesus Christ's brother. Sweat glistening on his sexy chest. This boy oozes arrgoant beauty...and rightfully so! His dancing is, in my non-dancing opinion, wonderful. His extensions, jumps, and lines are gorgeous because of his technique and his build.

I really want to fuck him. Sorry...it's true.

With luck, he'll come down to Orlando and try to be a dancer in a theme park. Then, I can try to pick him up at the gay bar. Dreams can come true...or, one can hope.

As for the girls, Sarah needs to go. Jamie should be close behind.

Oh, and Cat Deeley...please start saying, "judges" on your own...it's a highlight for me. Thanks.

Old Hags and Hangbags...for the FAGS!

2007-07-06T11:19:00.000-04:00

As I wished for in my previous entry...those Cosmo-swillin' ladies from Sex and the City are reuiniting for a film version...finally!

Here's what Kim Cattrall had to say:

“I’m really am so flattered because I feel that people actually do miss the show and the characters. I thought that the series really ended so well and to reopen it it would have to be a great script. As with any project that you do it really starts and ends with the script, you’ve got to ask the questions: Who are the characters? Where will they go? W hat will their journey be? Will people be interested?”

All I have to say is:

"Spice Girls...Sex and the City girls...bring on the damn GOLDEN GIRLS!"

Random Thoughts of Human Goodness

2007-06-29T14:11:00.000-04:00

I am totally addicted to So You Think You Can Dance. Last year it was Ryan that got my heart racing with his zexy grin. This year, I'm crazy for almost all of them: HOK!, Neil, Danny!, and Jesus (who got kicked off last night and reminded me WAY too much of my ex-boyfriend). I love this show better than American Idol. The creativity combined with the sexy bodies. Mia Michaels is brilliant and an amazing person!!

Got in a fight with the best friend. It's a shame. I still love her and always will, but girl needs to get her act together. She's a shell of her former self. I don't know when/how it happened, but she's fading away. Grow up already! Be accountable. Be responsible. Be respectful.

We are building a house in Windermere, Florida. It's just gone vertical! Exciting!

I'd love to get an iPhone. But, if I get one, then Beny will need/want one. That's $1,200 I shouldn't be spending right now when I've got an expensive mortgage looming.

My South Florida friend, Jeff, is back in my life and I couldn't be happier. Conversation is a little awkward since we took our two-year "break" from each other. Distance doesn't help things, either. But, regardless, I'm glad to have him back. I'm looking forward to growing closer over the years.

My new boss is "odd" to say the least. I can't figure out how to connect with him. I have no idea what he thinks of me or the job I am doing for him. I guess I'll find out at "review time" this fall.

I think I have gotten to the point where I don't care if I ever see a movie in the movie theater again. It's just so nice to stay home and watch them on the HDTV without rude people and cell phones texting and ringing.

Tonight on BET: Replay of the BET Awards. Watch it for the opening number...Jennifer Hudson singing WITH amazing Jennifer Holliday. One of the best performances of the past year for sure.

Ever meet people that you REALLY like and want to be better friends with, but it just never materializes? So frustrating, yet I bet it happens to ALL of us.

I've been a "bad" drunk lately. Not good. Don't know why I'm not a "good" drunk anymore. Is there any scientific reason?

As much as I love the Audi, I'm starting to hate it. CD player broke. Now the driver's window is having up-down issues. I desperately need to take it into for service (it's still under warranty), but the Audi dealer is on the other side of the earth from where I live. It involves a whole day off of work, but I only have 4 hours of vacation. Bummer. Make do with it for now.

I need some anonymous sex with a young desirable. I forgot how good that was.

Shamu Rocks at Sea World is pretty fun. however, the REAL fun show is the Sea Lions Tonight with Clyde & Seymore. Those sea lions make fun of everything in Sea World Orlando, and it's a hoot! It's even better if you hit the Hospitality House a few times prior to the show!

Universal Orlando has announced the "theme" of this year's Halloween Horror Nights. It seems that Freddy, Jason, and Letherface are teaming up to beat the crap out of us. Can NOT wait for this. HHN is by far one the major highlights of the year for me.

Jeff (see above) has invited us down to stay with him for a fun weekend. I'm looking forward to it. He's going to take me to Mai Kai (http://www.maikai.com/) which I have wanted to do for about two years now. Something hypnotic for me about waterfalls, tikis, bamboo, and strong Polynesian drinks. What a great combo! I hope there's a musty "old" smell to the place.

My parents are very good to me.

Spice Girls are back together...yay! Now if we can only work on reuniting the Golden Girls and the Sex and the City girls...

It's not work that makes work challenging, it's the people.

Mexican food. It's been a long time and I love you so.

Sentances are getting smaller.

Enough.

Fantasia -- the Color Purple

2007-05-14T12:29:00.000-04:00

Click above to hear someone's bootleg audio of Fantasia's opening night in "The Color Purple".

Simply stellar!

This is one of those special "moments" in time. If she can pull this type of thing off nightly, then I need to get my ass back up to the NYC to hear it.

Picked the wrong time to start building a house! Dern it.

Strange...

2007-05-09T13:43:00.000-04:00

Regardless of his homewrecking ways...

...Beny and I still wish we were friends with Franky Franky.

We miss him.

Work bitch!

2007-04-20T16:29:00.000-04:00

Holy shiite!

Getcher asses over to iTunes and download Jonny Mcgovern's latest GAYPIMP podcast. The remix of "Somethin' for the Fellas (who like the fellas)" Remix is HOT HOT HOT!

If you haven't heard the original, it's on the brazilliant East Village Mixtape: This is NYC Bitch!, available on www.gaypimp.com or iTunes.

Enjoy! You won't be sorry.

Ooo it's large, like Charles in Charge!

Surprise!

2007-03-13T09:18:00.000-04:00

Okay...so said Latino Homophobe that lives next door came over and got his drink on Friday night.

I was the DVD DJ and was Attention Deficit Disorder-ing the whole process. Latino was in his swimming trunks and kept tugging on what looked like a growing buldge in his pants. So, I selected the appropriate DVD -- Showgirls.

Around midnight, Beny decided to go to bed. Latino and I were watching the NC-17 camp classic and I could tell that Latino neighbor was really getting horny.

I suggested that we watch some straight porn...of course, there's none in my house. Latino suggested we go to his.

He took off to go back to his place and I was about twenty steps behind him.

Got into his house and he puts on some crappy straight "action". I told him that it was making me horny and asked if I could whack-off. He said it was fine. Then, I asked if he wanted his dick sucked. He said it was fine!

He dropped trou and I went to town on his completely shaven, uncut chorizo.

He finished in my mouth and I left. (I spit when I got home.)

I told Beny when I got back at my place. He wasn't mad that I did it, but he was mad that I woke him up at 2am to tell him about it...

...oh, and that I got a piece of the neighbor first.

Last night Beny talked to the neighbor and the neighbor told him that he's going to move back to Puerto Rico in 3 weeks.

Man, my BJ skills must really be "off".

Or, Mr. "Straight" Latino who declares that he LOVES "From Justin to Kelly" AND "Moulin Rouge" might find it challenging having gay sex so easily available to him.

Demons. Issues. Dude, they can be a real bitch!

The latest...

2007-02-28T09:23:00.000-05:00

I know. I know. It's been awhile since I've really typed up anything of significance on my blog. I guess I get forty lashes with a wet noodle...hopefully Daniel Radcliffe's noodle!

It's not like anyone is still reading my blog, anyway. I've been at this thing for like two years and only have a handful of faithful readers that have probably given up on me and the blog. So, I really wonder if I should keep going at all...? I will. But, I'll keep on this just for me. For the therapy of it all.

Recently, I took a 3-day cruise on the Disney Cruise Line. It was truly a fantastic time. I would have enjoyed a little bit more "alone time", as Beny and I were together every minute (even did a couples massage). But, it was still good for us and our relationship to simply get away together. I found myself missing my dog, Chopstick, very very much. I guess he really is my little child. I always thought that people were freaks when they said that their dog is like their kid, but now I think I truly "get it".

During the cruise, we had a great little gay bee as our Assistant Server. His name was Brent. Next time he's in Orlando, he's supposed to give us a phone call and hang out with us. It should be a good time, especially since he was a great audience for my crass humor. I love people that laugh at my crazy mouth...who doesn't, really?

We went to Atlantis and coincidentally ran across this dude that we met at a party two weeks prior. His name is Fabian and he's quite a "looker". Maybe it's because I was drunk at said party, but Beny indicated that he thought that Fabian was attracted to me. Wouldn't that make me feel good? But, of course. Anyway, we talked to Fabian and his travelling companion for a whopping two minutes. "Hey, what are you doing here?" kind of crap. I was still surprised to see him.

Sidebar: Here's a little theory. He met me two weeks prior. Beny said that he liked me. I DO remember telling him that we were going on the Disney Cruise Line. So, did he and his friend book at stay at Atlantis in Nassau KNOWING / HOPING that he would run across us? I don't know. People are capable of anything and the Nassau port has a limited number of places that the people on the cruise ships visit. Honestly, I think if he knew this...he'd know that his chances of running into us on Nassau would be pretty good. Then again, maybe it was all a coincidence.

Okay, so after Nassau we were delivered like cargo to Disney's private island, Castaway Cay (pronounced "key"). this place truly was a slice of paradise! We rode Disney theme park-styled trams over to the "Adults Only" beach, Serenity Bay and secured a hammock on the gorgeous penninsula. Goodness...as nice as THAT was, it sure was boring. We did have a beach waitress give us an amazing "Chonch Cooler" with a floater of Bacardi 151 -- at 10:00am!!!

After vegitating on Serenity Bay, we rented bikes and rode around the island. This was great fun and much needed exercise after pounding down six meals a day on the ship!

Anyway, the cruise was great and I'd love to go again real soon.

What else is going on? Hmmm...staying for free at Disney's Saratoga Springs Friday night. That should be a fun little mini-party.

Ellen's coming to Orlando at the end of March and I'm trying to snag some tickets to see her.

Oh...my next door neighbor rant:

We have a new hot nugget of sexiness that moved in solo next door to me. His name is Luis. Luis is a 21-year-old hot ass Latino that currently works at a tire place as a tire tech.

Hot! Grease monkey! Yummers.

Well, this past weekend, he came over to our house while we were having a hell of a party. I talked to him a bunch to feel out is "gayness". I invited him to go out to the gay bars with us some time and he flipped, "No no no no.......I don't want no guy touching me!" I went on and on about how it's identical to me going to a straight club and having to face the fears that I face: Ugly Betty chicks hitting on me and I'm gay, Straight Guys pounding my scull because I'm gay, etc. No matter how many valid points I made, this little grease monkey remaind closed-minded. Too bad for him. He'll never know what real fun and insanity he can have at the gay bar.

His loss.

Regardless of the fact that he doesn't want to hang out with fags at a gay bar, the real irony is that he came over chilled out with me and Beny for three hours the following night.

Trade, I suspect.

My little project, I suspect.

I guess that's enough for now. Until next time...

Gay Pimpin'

2007-02-06T12:24:00.000-05:00

Jonny McGovern and his cast of characters blast their hilarious faggoty fun out of the East Village (and Williamsburg?)

He's been going for years, but is on the cusp of superstardom as his new skit show will be popping up on LOGO soon. His gaypimp podcast is catching on fast and fabulous. Last year's This is NYC Bitch, The East Village Mixtape blew open the door with La Mady, Linda James and the gang...only to be followed up soon by Gays Gone Wild blasting my Audi's speakers in 2007.

Kiss the bedazzeled ass of a genius and a lover of the Golden Girls -- Jonny McGovern! He's about to rule this big gay world.

He's already ruling mine!

Bryanboy

2006-12-28T11:53:00.000-05:00

I stumbled upon this hot little shit in the Phillipines named Braynboy (http://bryanboy.com).

His photos make my heart skip a beat and my tool pulse. His humor delish. His talk of drug use makes my nose twitch. Too bad my dern metabolism is starting to slow, or I'd give him a run for his money.

I want him in the most stalker-way possible.

He rates people on his "Gayometer", so this one is for him:

Shirt from Barney's. Shorts from Club Monaco. Prada keychain. Versace glasses. Diesel watch.

Urine smell from the NYC MTA.

Be kind, my sweet almond.

Inspiration

2006-12-22T14:36:00.000-05:00

My best friend Donna said the craziest thing the other night. The minute I heard it, I decided it needed to be on t-shirts.

You can see what she said by clicking this link:
http://www.cafepress.com/sandwichart

Azteca's

2006-10-27T09:57:00.000-04:00

Had an amazingly authentic Mexican dinner the other night at a place in downtown Kissimmee called, Azteca's. This place was a home-cooked fresh meal and was wonderful! The tortila soup was a meal on it's own and really stood out as a favorite.

Donna went again last night and said that there was a hot, young olive-skinned and pretty-faced waiter.

I will be back for sure!

Prideful Weekend

2006-10-16T16:06:00.000-04:00

While I was afraid I was going to OD on Orlando PRIDE festivities this weekend, I ended up having a nice time.

Got the "drink on" around 1pm and Beny drove us (Donna included) down to the big Orlando PRIDE Parade 2006. The streets were packed!! As we were mapping out our prime viewing location, we landed in front of Sam Snead's. Mainly because it was a bar along the parade route. I chugged down a Long Island and heard sirens. It was the honkers, but luckily they weren't coming after me...they were riding their hogs down the street to announce the arrival of the parade.

It was a fun time! Everyone was smiling and unified. I was especially impressed by the large turnout and support from the community. Orlando has come a long way...and still has a long way to go. Good news is, no violent incidents occured.

Highlights:

Seeing Moria from the Phillips Phile.
Watching a blitzed Billy Manes (my hero) rolling around in his convertable...I'll have what he's having thank you vera much.
The unadvertised/unscheduled parade of pets as everyone returned back to wherever they came from.

After the parade, we went up to the balcony at WaiTiki and had a prime view of everyone down below in the Heritage Square as the went from Condom Booth to Beer Booth to AIDS Booth that are the typical vendors for events such as these. The Big Kahuna Platter wasn't as big as I remembered...we scarfed it down rather quickly along with a couple more Long Islands.

Then, the night started to blur.

Parliament House ensued. STRONG Islands.

Had Wendy's when I got home and don't remember eating it.

Can't wait for next year! I'll just have to remember to ask for the day after off from work.

The latest

2006-10-10T16:43:00.000-04:00

Beny had his birthday and I had no idea what to get for him. All he said that he wanted was this $1700 Cartier ring.

Well, THAT certainly wasn't going to happen.

So, I offered up weekend getaways: Naples Ritz Carlton, NYC, Vegas, Key West...none of which seemed to interest him. Return to the ring.

THAT certainly wasn't going to happen.

Discovery Cove at Sea World?

Nope...ring...

Then, I began a frantic search for other nice (and less expensive) rings. There were many to choose from , but nothing really as simple, modern and pretty as the Cartier "Double C" ring that he was eyeing.

Certainly, it wasn't going to happen?

Three days before the birthday. WHAT AM I GOING TO GET HIM???

Two days.

One day.

It happened. Damn it. I caved in a bought the mother f-er and it was non-refundable.

Beny had a nice birthday. The next day, he went to Cartier to exchange ring sizes. Mr. Happy Birthday decided to plop down an additional $1200 to get the same ring with diamonds on it.

I guess we will be confined to Orlando for quite some time.

Time goes by...so quickly...

2006-09-22T11:23:00.000-04:00

It seems like just yesterday that I was in Boston and then Miami sweating my ass off at Madonna's amazing Confessions Tour.

Alas, she has finished the tour in Japan. Nothing more to confess, I guess?

Well, Madonna has confessed one final thing:
http://www.marketwire.com/mw/release_html_b1?release_id=165565

Madonna Releases Statement Explaining Crucifix Scene From Confessions Tour

NEW YORK, NY -- (MARKET WIRE) -- September 21, 2006 -- As Madonna's Confessions Tour comes to an end in Japan this week, the artist has released a statement regarding the much talked about Crucifixion scene.

"I am very grateful that my show was so well received all over the world. But there seems to be many misinterpretations about my appearance on the cross and I wanted to explain it myself once and for all. There is a segment in my show where three of my dancers 'confess' or share harrowing experiences from their childhood that they ultimately overcame. My 'confession' follows and takes place on a Crucifix that I ultimately come down from. This is not a mocking of the church. It is no different than a person wearing a Cross or 'Taking Up the Cross' as it says in the Bible. My performance is neither anti-Christian, sacrilegious or blasphemous. Rather, it is my plea to the audience to encourage mankind to help one another and to see the world as a unified whole. I believe in my heart that if Jesus were alive today he would be doing the same thing."

"My specific intent is to bring attention to the millions of children in Africa who are dying every day, and are living without care, without medicine and without hope. I am asking people to open their hearts and minds to get involved in whatever way they can."

"The song ends with a quote from the Bible's Book of Matthew: 'For I was hungry and you gave me food. I was naked and you gave me clothing. I was sick and you took care of me and God replied, "Whatever you did for the least of my brothers... you did it to me."'

"Please do not pass judgment without seeing my show."

Madonna's "Confessions Tour - Live From London" is scheduled to air on NBC this November. NBC has not confirmed whether they will include this portion of the show in their broadcast.

So, there you have it. Well, not ALL of it. NBC has made their decision and it's a poor one:

NBC Backs Off Madonna Crucifix Scene
American Family Association Chairman Donald E. Wildmon says NBC will not air the scene showing Madonna being crucified in the upcoming November special. "NBC does not want a fight with AFA and the Christian community, said Wildmon.

"NBC may wiggle and wobble, but in the final analysis, they will not show that scene. We expect a public announcement from NBC canceling the scene within two weeks."

According to New York Daily News, the NBC network is retreating from an earlier announcement of its plan to air a two-hour concert special featuring Madonna hanging on a cross wearing a fake crown of thorns. NBC Entertainment chief Kevin Reilly had said earlier Madonna considered the scene mocking the crucifixion of Christ the highlight of her show.

"We (NBC) viewed it and didn't see it as being inappropriate."

Story Continues Below...

...However, his opinion changed quickly after NBC came under tremendous pressure from American Family Association and its supporters to cancel broadcasting of Madonna's blasphemous actions. Wildmon said if the networks continue to show their disrespect and animosity toward people of the Christian faith, the opposition against them will only grow stronger.

And, so the "dumbing down" of America continues, as we all still are absorbed into the "collective". Yuck.

As a "gift" to all that love Madonna, here's a download for a studio mix demo of "Hung Up" as it appears in the Confessions Tour. Enjoy!

http://www.sendspace.com/file/mbkpd7

Mario / Lopez

2006-09-20T16:54:00.000-04:00

Wank / Fest

I saw the still shots. They took my breath away.

I saw him in the Greg Louganis Story standing on the high-dive. Package bulging in the profiled speedo. Gasp.

I watched the jump-rope video on YouTube. Wheez!

Last night...many angles of Adonis perfection. I love you Mario Lopez. Well, they might call it lust. Don't blame me. I call it love.

I'm reaching for my inhaler and lube. Thank god for TiVo!

I'll be enjoying you for quite some time...

Make it Funky...

2006-09-15T08:44:00.000-04:00

This past month, I have been in a major depression...a funk. Quite honestly, I'm not sure what has brought it onto me. Bills? Relationship? Job? Current Events?

I'm beginning to wonder if it's my mid-life crisis.

If I go all Kevin Spacey in "American Beauty", we might need to worry. Right now, I worry about how this might be affecting my health. I've been experiencing tremendous back pain and constant upset stomach issues. I've also been sleeping WAY too much.

I really don't have any answers. I don't have any understanding as to why I am going through this. The uncertainty only adds to the problem.

I haven't been to a therapist. Could they really help me?

How can they help me, when I can't even help myself?

Permission

2006-09-07T15:03:00.000-04:00


This needs to be broadcast on TV once per hour on all channels.

2006-09-07T12:50:00.000-04:00

Get ready for the coolest annoying trend!

As much as I'm going to want to get a shirt with this technology built-in, I shudder to think how annoying the tred will become when it catches on.

Laborious Weekend

2006-09-05T09:46:00.000-04:00

Three days is never enough.

Luckily, the people in the office are in a pretty good mood. I think we could learn a lot from those European countries that require a 30 hour work week.

Friday was Savoy and Lava Lounge. A combined total of seven Long Island Iced Teas. Woot! Saw many people this weekend that I haven't seen in quite some time. (Shout out to Lindberg and his charming boyfriend, Dan! This is a great couple, people!)

A chaotic night indeed that ended up at the Krystal Drive-Thru. I was still tasting them most of the day Saturday. Yucky.

Saturday was recouperation day.

Sunday, Beny and I went to Cypress Gardens (I had a free admission/free parking promo). I don't know who this park is attempting to cater to, but I don't think I am the demographic. In fact, I couldn't even fit on one of their coasters. Not because I'm fat, but because my upper-torso was too long. The thunderstorms rolled in before I even got to see how "interesting" the Ice Skating Show was supposed to be. We stayed for only three hours.

Sunday night (after a nice nap during the thunderstorms), we ventured into a jam-packed Parliament House. Very wild night, indeed. Can someone please tell the ex to leave me alone?

Monday...more rest. Beny went to the Ritz-Carlton for a massage. I stayed home and ordered up the Sicilian Lasagna Pizza from Pizza Hut. DELICIOUS!

Now, I'm back at work...along with everyone else.

Originally, I wanted to spend the Labor Day Weekend in New Orleans to celebrate Southern Decadence. I think that would have been a great time, but I'm glad we just took it easy here in O-town. I feel completely recharged.

Call me Crazy...

2006-08-29T11:53:00.001-04:00

...I was kind of hoping Hurricane Ernesto would have been a little bit stronger.

Not that I wish ill-will on my neighbors in South Florida, but more for selfish reasons.

Ernesto (currently a Tropical Storm) is scheduled to start showing signs in my area late tonight and throughout the day tomorrow. While we will see some big wind gusts and have torrential downpours throughout the day, it's not enough.

I was hoping for the day off of work for "safety" and to have the opportunity to have a little Hurricane Party at the house.

While I never hope for a "big one" (except for during sex), I hope for a big enough one to have the day off of work...

Cravings...(or Damn you McDonald's!)

2006-08-17T15:57:00.000-04:00

Anybody that knows that in the past four years I have gained a whopping 50 pounds knows that I love to eat (and drink, and anything else...).

However, in my quest to lose some of that weight, I've been eating smaller portions and healthier options.

The biggest challenge now is that I get real cravings for certain foods that I haven't had in awhile and when I finally get them I am SO tempted to overindulge.

This weekend...Tex Mex.

I've also begun to crave this little innocent offering from McDonald's called the "Snack Wrap". Have you tried one of these things? Holy shit! At $1.29 it is inexpensive, but packed with yumminess. Do yourself a favor...swing thu the drive thru today.

Tonight...two of 'em.

Only 45 pounds to go!

2006-08-11T10:57:00.000-04:00

Cazwell -- All Over Your Face

This is by far the hottest thing in this already hot summer. Nothing better than homo hottie hip hoppers...oh, and Amanda Lepore. Enjoy!

Music Watch -- er, Listen

2006-08-02T13:38:00.000-04:00

Here's some fab new tunes I've stumbled upon. (Of course, my bootleg of Madonna's Confessions Tour in Phoenix, AZ still is residing in my CD player lately):

"One Night Only" Beyonce -- from DREAMGIRLS

http://dreamgirlsfans.blogspot.com/

(scroll down and look for the extended version)

"Another One Bites the Dust" DJ Cedric Gervais

Ramblings...

2006-07-26T13:18:00.000-04:00

Madonna in Miami was better than Madonna in Boston.

My life is complete: Lance Bass is out of the closet and admits it.

Ryan on "So You Think You Can Dance" is hot. Too bad he'll be kicked off this week.

2006-07-18T11:31:00.000-04:00

Madonna Confessions Tour Boston 7/6/06

Not the highest quality, but you can certainly see why I'm itching to go again.

All good things must happen again...

2006-07-18T11:16:00.000-04:00

...and so I've just committed to going to see Madonna AGAIN this weekend in Miami. Woot!

The show was amazing in Boston. I also had amazing seats, thanks to Brian.

Here's my little quasi-review I sent off to Brian when I came back from Boston:

I arrived at the TD Banknorth Garden at about 7pm and quickly scuttled in to locate my seats – correction – my awesome seats! On the floor, ten seats in from the left of the end-cap of the catwalk/runway. It was rather hot in the arena, so I decided to go wander around a little since I knew that I was all-set with a great view for the show.

Walking around, I saw a tremendously large couple dressed in garb:

Him: Converse high tops, fishnet stockings, sequined baby blue short-shorts, A dark blue satin shirt with the word "Sorry" on the back, and tons of make-up (including false eyelashes) and blonde hair spiking up from his pumpkin head.

Her: Only to be described as Shamu as a "negative" image topped-off by a top hat. She had a "Bride of Frankenstein" motif going on, along with leftover lace from Ann and Nancy Wilson of Heart.

After giggling at them, I stood and watched as other Madonnaphiles strutted around to have the proverbial floor yanked out from under them as they saw this delicious couple. More giggles. Jaws dropping.

Later I ran across a girl painted in head-to-toe silver. She had ‘Fever’ scrawled across her rump. It was a fun and freaky thing to see, but considering the 85 degree temperature in the arena, I’d hate to be near her watching her mercury melt.

Saw this cute fag wearing a "Dance Motherfu*ker" t-shirt. I liked that. Considering how Madonna always insists on heavy audience participation (i.e. dancing), this shirt was really appropriate. This dude ended up being an attention whore and sat right behind me. As we were waiting for the show to begin, the crowd would occasionally begin to cheer. This dude would pop up from his seat and put both arms in the air and would proceed to turn to each side of the stadium. I think he thought we were cheering for him, but we weren’t. Maybe I just perceived him incorrectly, because once the show began he was a non-stop energy machine and I had fun watching him.

Never judge a book by its arrogance?

I had a cute young gay bee sitting next to me, and I think he was with his mother. He was really sweet and became my concert companion, as it was our "first time" Madonna experience. He kept looking up at the great big disco ball in the sky, waiting to see her climb inside. I asked him if he was looking for her up there. He said, "Yes." I then told him the theory of how the ball comes down and she climbs inside from under the catwalk. He looked like I killed his dog, but he still remained a loyal companion for the concert. Unfortunately, I never even knew his first name.

After a long wait in the heat, the lights went out and the frenzy ensued. It was 9pm. As soon as the 1.5 ton disco ball lowered from heaven above, my entire row rushed over to the catwalk/runway. Damn! Disco ball looks like it’s going to land on my head. It sits there, music and lights swirl. Madonna and horses fill the screens with beautiful imagery. The anticipation was unbearable. She’s telling us something, but it was inaudible over the screams.

Then, it happened…boom! The disco ball cracked open and revealed that 50-year-ol’ chick inside. I think I peed my pants, but I wasn’t sure if it was pee or sweat running down my leg. I yelled out a "Aw. F*ck!" in the most positive of inflections. There she was. Just out of reach, but close enough to study every toned inch of her. The girl is rock-hard. Make-up perfect. Clothes were amazing. In the words of the ghost-host in the Haunted Mansion, "there’s no turning back now…"

Literally.

This giant steroid guy in the crowd barked that we needed to go back to our seats. Impossible. As we rushed the catwalk, others had followed us. A return to our seats was not going to happen. This guy became a constant annoyance and virtually ruined the show for me, as he was so consumed with where we ended up standing (his seats). He literally wouldn’t even watch the show because he was so concerned about getting everyone to go back to their seats. Everyone ignored him, but I couldn’t. He shared my three feet of personal space and it was terrifying and awkward. I was determined to ignore him and soak up ‘Her Madgesty’ who was RIGHT THERE in front of my face. His friend tried unsuccessfully to get him to "forgeddaboutit." By trying to get the guy to dance. The steroid just couldn’t let it go. Must’ve been his Meth.

Here’s the best that I can do for a song-by-song recap:

1. Future Lovers – This is how it all began. I was in full "Oh my God" mode and it’s really a big blur. I do remember hoping she’d look right at me, or at least point her cattle prod at me. (She never did.) When she slid in Donna Summer’s, "I Feel Love" I was singing along and loving it. LOVING it!

2. Get Together – This was the first shot at checking out the dancers. I must confess, I didn’t soak up Madonna’s singing too much here (she went up to the stage). I ended up looking at each dancer as they came down to the end of the catwalk. They are an incredibly talented group. My personal hotness and fav is of course, Cloud. He seemed to be having the most fun of all of them. His skill was stunning. He’d smile at the crowd and made me melt.

3. Like a Virgin – Watching her make her way up the catwalk on the left of the stage, she climbed aboard the saddle for her merry-go-round pole dance. It was at this moment when I realized, "I can’t believe I am watching Madonna sing the song that made her a household name." It was one of those surreal moments that makes life worth living. Screens on the stage projected actual images of her broken bones from when she fell off the pony.

4. Jump – The giant lighting rig above the center runway began to lower. I had no idea what was going to happen here. Once it rested on the stage, there were various platforms and poles. The male dancers began City Jumping/Free Running (or whatever it’s called). This was extreme athletics and they made it look effortless. Madonna strutted down the while the guys were flying past her. She kept the song going by flipping around on the parallel bars WHILST singing. Fun stuff.

5. Live to Tell – The show turns serious. As the disco cross emerges with a beautiful backdrop of warm yellow-orange sunlight. He clothes were gorgeous. A rich blood-red pair of velvet pants, bright-red belt that looked like it alone was about $1500, and lovely peach/rust orange sheer blouse, and a crown of thorns on her head. Above the crucifix, numbers counted upwards. The numbers continued to grow as she sang the song (very well for the most part). Once the numbers got to 12,000,000, words and images began to appear to remind us how many African kids are abandoned each year, due to AIDS. All sorts of reminders about when we can do. Pretty preachy, but very touching.

6. Forbidden Love – Madonna turns the spotlight on the dancers during this one. Two guys stood side-by-side shirtless. Sexy. She’s singing ‘Forbidden Love’ and she makes it obvious that she’s aware of the struggles gay people go through each day. The dancers did this AMAZINGLY choreographed routine with just their arms. Flipping and intertwining their arms, it symbolized how gay couples struggle to hold hands and express their love, but have to quickly pull away for the fear of someone discovering the hand-holding. Very hard to explain, but was a magnificent visual.

7. Isaac – One of my favorite parts of the show. The backdrop was trippy, the song was, too. Lots of fantastic dancing during this one with the whole group (Madonna front and center). My only gripe was that this was mostly on the stage and the runway wasn’t used. Oh, well. Oh, and she introduced us to "Isaac" at the beginning of the song, "Ok everyone, this is my dear friend, Isaac."

8. Sorry – Crowd insane. Energy on high. Plenty of Madonna flipping the middle finger at Bush on the screens. More SOLID dancing.

9. Like It or Not – Why can’t I remember this one? Oh, that’s right. Steroid confronted us again during this one and after he realized there was nothing that could be done, he gave up. But, not after some words were exchanged. It took some time for me to settle back into the show. I can’t believe this asshole jolted me back to reality during the show. I was pissed.

10. Sorry Video Reprise – more images of "the liars". Rice, Cheney, Blair, Hussein, etc. Political and appropriate. I loved this.

11. I Love New York – A little white line began on the left of the stage and started outlining skyscrapers on the back-drop. I knew I was headed to New York. She popped up from the lift on the stage and revealed a new outfit (kind of hard to see), but it consisted of all black and had feathers around her neck. Black guitar strapped to her, she began strumming I love new Yorrrrrrrrk I feel like a dork. She looks so damn ROCK CHICK cool. Boston didn’t get into this song. I hear there’s big rivalry between the two cities. When Madonna said, "I love Boston, TOO!" The crowd erupted. This was the only song during the show that I thought my ears might bleed.

12. Ray of Light – Effortless transition into this song. I knew right away we were headed into this one. More filler than anything, I still enjoy this song. It just keeps on driving. She’s still on the stage giving her best ‘Blondie’ impersonation. Obviously not lip-synched and very top-notch.

13. Let It Will Be – Stripping down to "Roadie" attire of a black t-shirt and black jeans. Hair tousled. Make-up more faint. This performance was really unusual. I can’t explain her dancing during this in any way other than intentionally frantic. It was actually very captivating and freeform. Wasn’t sure what she was going to do next, you know? No dancers on stage here, just her. When she started stumbling down the middle catwalk we were going nuts. This was a fun one. The images on the screen were live camera shots of her, but in "negative" or "reverse" image (see Shamu lady above).
At the end of this song she went to drink out of her water bottle. Someone yelled, "I love you!" and Madonna asked, "you LOVE me? Hmm…would you die for me? You would? How ‘bout that? Someone in Boston would die for me!"

14. Drowned World/Substitute for Love – One of my favorite songs. Where’s my lighter?

15. Paradise (Not for Me) – I think I zoned out on something here. Maybe the steroid-meth "issue" again.

16. Disco Inferno/Music Mashup – BAM!!! This was a frenzy! Rollerskating dancers doing breakdancing. Cloud’s pants had a downward-pointing arrow drawn on the rear of his pants pointing directly at his "hole". Lovely. The mix of music was genius. The energy in the arena shook the floor. She popped out in her whiter-than-white Travolta Saturday Night Fever suit. This was stunning and a huge highlight of the evening.

17. Erotica – One of my favorite moments happened at the opening of this song. Four LED disco balls came down above the stage. The one on the left shot a spotlight down directly on the stage (the rest of the stage was a dimly lit blue). Madonna stepped into that shaft of light and removed her jacket seductively as the notes of Erotica pulsed. Bam. That light went out and the spotlight emitting from the disco ball on the right lit up. She sauntered over and peeled off her shirt, revealing the top portion of that white and blue leotard. Bam. That light went out and the middle two lit up. She stepped into the light and unlike Carol Anne, she pulled her pants off. Erotica indeed. Big dancing with the cast.

18. La Isla Bonita – That same Guitar dude from previous tours started strumming those beautiful notes. She blew with amazing vocals! VERY good. As she came back down the middle catwalk with the dancers, she got us doing that fabulous latino-island-handclap that matches this song. Ta-ta-tada-dada-da-da. Lovely.

19. Lucky Star – At the end of the previous song, she collapses face down front and center on the stage. A white satin cape is held up to show that it reads, "Dancing Queen". It’s draped over her. Then the famous sound of the beginning of Lucky Star kicks up and she stands to open the cape with white lights on the inside lining. Oh so cool. Dancing Dancing Dancing.

20. Hung Up – everything builds to this. She disappeared and the dancers blew us all away. When Madonna reappeared, she was dressed in the purple leotard from the "Hung Up" video. The dancing here was insane and perfect – very similar to the actual video. The giant disco ball lowered and illuminated the entire arena. Madonna came down the each catwalked and shouted at us to sing with her. "I can’t HEAR youuuuu…" Big crescendo in the music and…pow…gold mylar confessions balloons dropped from the sky. Each dancers diappeared into the hole at the end of the catwalk. She said, "Thank you!" The music then cranked down like a vehicle slowing down.

The lights went dark and the video screen asked us, "Have you confessed?"

It was a journey that I will never forget. In my next posting, I will send a brief video clip that is almost identical to the view I had. In fact, it was taken only three rows behind me.

2006-06-23T09:37:00.000-04:00

Happy Morning!

This might be the finest advertising jingle ever!

I love it.

Paul Revere and Madonna

2006-06-19T15:30:00.001-04:00

I suppose it's ok to make it "official" now.

I'm heading to Boston in a couple of weeks to see Mommy Madonna on tour.

I've got to tell you...I never thought I'd be able to see her in concert. I'll never forget when my ex-friends, Jeff & Tri, went to see her with some tickets that somebody gave them and they seemed so underwhelmed by the concert (Drowned World).

I simply couldn't believe their lack of enthusiasm...I mean, this is Madonna we are talking about here. In fact, once I was finally able to see that concert via DVD, I declared "Drowned World" as the best concert ever.

That's the joy of Momma Madonna. She keeps topping herself.

SIDEBAR: I'd really love to see Madonna ACTUALLY top herself, if you know what I mean.

Anyway, Brian...one of my closest friends who lives diagonally on the other side of the USA went on to fuel my "I'll never get to see Madonna in concert whining" when he was able to go see Madonna two-nights-in-a-row for the Re-invention Tour.

Two nights -- WITH incredible seats.

His photos made me green with envy, as it look like she was in his living room on a bar stool with a guitar -- with better lighting.

I was happy for him. I really was. It was exciting to hear someone who finally enjoyed the experience of seeing her in concert AND was so happy about it. I was able to live vicariously though him.

Now, the tables have turned.

Brian isn't able to go. He has made me the sacrificial lamb and has graciously given me the opportunity to head to Boston to pop my Madonna cherry.

I refuse to wear a rubber.

I want every bit of her delicious amazingness to seep into every pore on my body.

I want Brian to be as happy for me as I was for him.

I only hope I don't let him down.

I'm doing a wham-bam trip to Boston for this concert.

Fly in...to the hotel bar...to the TD Banknorth Center...then who knows or who cares.

I probably should spend an extra day to truly sight-see in Boston, but I honestly don't care.

After the concert, I'm most likely going back to the hotel and to bed. I don't want to visit some crappy Boston bars and allow some preening bitchy fags to ruin my night of bliss.

I'll be bcak in Orlando by 3:30pm the following day.

Pray for me...
...I'm working on my confessions.

A dilemma?

2006-06-16T09:37:00.000-04:00

My dear friend Brian worships Madonna. Rarely a week goes by without him sending out an update email as to the latest on dear ol' Madge.

He purchased two prime tickets to see her in Boston on July 6th.

Poor Brian has an unfortunate health problem that is prohibiting him from flying to see the concert and has graciously offered the tickets to me.

I want them. Badly.

Here's the dilemma:

Who goes with me on such short notice? (Beny will be visiting his family in Singapore and Malaysia.)
What the heck do I do with my dog? (I can't handle flying solo and dealing with the dog for the trip.)

I've got a bunch of ducks I need to get in a row before I can commit to going on this trip.

They say that where there is a will, there's a way (Brittney even said that in her interview last night...)

Anyway, my day is going to be filled with scrabling and phone calls. I have got to try to make this trip happen.

If not for me...for Brian, too. I owe it to him for being such a wonderful and gracious friend.

Stay tuned!

Wisdumb

2006-06-14T13:15:00.000-04:00

Secrets and Lies only lead to catastrophe.

Jumbled thoughts...

2006-06-12T08:40:00.000-04:00

Couldn't you almost hear Oprah screaming "Racism!" in the audience at the Tony Awards last night? The Color Purple didn't score much of anything...with the exception of the stellar LaChanze, who continues to ease me into work many mornings in my car.
I'm on day three of some strange laryngitis. Don't know why I have it, but I'm calling it a blessing as I just emailed all of my co-workers and advised them that I plan to keep my talking at a minimum.
Went to Sea World on Saturday with the express purpose of seeing 'Believe' and to ride the new 'Shamu Express'. As the ominous rain clouds approached, I had to skip out of the park missing both. Oh well, at least I was able to get a ride on the Sky Tower (I always love the Sky Tower).
Saw 'A Prairie Home Companion' yesterday. This is a GREAT film. Go see it! Some good laughs in there, too!
No, really...GO SEE IT!!
The performances of 'the Pajama Game', 'the Wedding Singer', and 'the Drowsy Chapperone' were so full of energy and fun that I was laughing my ass off. THIS is why I wish I lived in NYC! The touring productions of shows are decent as they blow through OrBLANDo, but nothing can compare to the talent on Broadway -- hell, even Julia Roberts knows it.
Had some Dim Sum for lunch yesterday at Ming Court. I've been there numerous times, but...wow...what an operation this restaurant is.
I hate watching my boyfriend eat Chicken Feet. I just can't attempt to eat that.
Tropical Depression/Storm Alberto is going to be blowing through Florida today. It's NOTHING major, yet the stupid fuckheads at 'Local 6' felt that they need to split-screen my giant TV last night to show the "important" coordinates. Whatever.
Jeez...wait until you hear "the penguin joke". It's hilarious and nobody knows why.
Amazingly, I'm not "craving" any particular food item today. Odd.
I can't believe he's still the President. CLinton was almost kicked out for getting a 'hummer'. Simply unreal.
I just realized that I'm working with an office full of mostly women today...good thing or a bad thing...I'll never tell...
I want to have an 18-year-old "houseboy". How the hell do you get one of those? Beny has agreed to it. We just can't find one (or a good one, at least).
Lewis Black's new HBO special was "ok"...but, he was spot-on with his comments about how society treats "the gays".
Take a moment to "look what God has done..."
Peace.

AmBUSHed!

2006-06-07T12:47:00.000-04:00

Ha! Ha!

Take THAT! Republicans with agendas...

...and to think THEY say that there is a 'Gay Agenda'. Unreal. My only agenda is to not feel like a second class citizen and to have the same rights as the rest of this "Free" (bullshit) country of ours.

Here's the result:

Gay Marriage Ban Defeated In Senate
June 7, 2006 11:16 a.m. EST
Jacob Cherian - All Headline News Contributor

Washington D.C. (AHN) - A constitutional amendment to ban gay marriage was defeated in the Senate Wednesday.

However, supporters said that several new votes for the measure represent progress, which gives the GOP's base reason to vote on Election Day.
Associated Press reports supporters failed to get the 60 votes required for the measure to survive a test vote.

Had it survived, a two-thirds majority in both houses of Congress would have been required to send an amendment to the states. It then would have had to be ratified by at least 38 state legislatures.

Those who supported a ban on gay marriage took comfort in the fact that the idea received several new votes from Republican newcomers elected after the amendment received its last vote in 2004.

Well, bully for them. Pricks.

Got your RED shirt ready?

2006-05-30T11:12:00.000-04:00

It's coming. Tons of guys will be, too.

The "First Saturday in June" is an unoffical holiday for me every year. This is the weekend when literally hundreds of thousands of fags, dykes, bears, leather daddies, cubs, prissy bitches, and circuit boyz descend on Orlando and the faux-reality of the theme parks the area provides for Gay Days.

Combine the fun of a visit to Walt Disney World's Magic Kingdom with a sea of RED shirts (the "required" attire) and the place takes on a whole new life that is only able to be seen this one day every year.

It certainly IS a fun time. The daily 3pm parade is usually performed with a fever-pitch, as the crowds of adoring GLBT fans work the parade performers into a frenzy. Of course, there is also the oddity and photo-op as hunreds of bears congregate in front of the "Country Bear Jamboree".

It's a gay old time, indeed.

I usually wrap-up my day in the park by heading over to the ironically named "Outer Rim" bar at Disney's Contermporay Resort to start getting my drink on. Hold the rim-job, please.

But, the weekend begins long before the fun and fantasy of the Magic Kingdom.

Tons of all-night parties and nightclub events turn Orlando into a non-stop party, with something for everyone (well, except for the closed-minded "God Hates Fags" Christian Conservatives that will be protesting everywhere that they can).

My week starts out with the Thursday night ritual of heading to the home of the revolving dancefloor: Mannequins at Pleasure Island. A place notoriously known as ManneQUEENS on this night of nights. Normally, this place is so packed that there is a two hour wait just to get into the club. No worries. The garage door has been opened and all of the excess inside spills right out into the queue line. Of course, it's hard for those nose-candy queens to find a stall to snort their "pixie dust"...hopefully, the have opted for a pill, instead.

Yes, this is a weekend of pounding music, bodies, and frantic heartbeats...as most participanted are heavily self-medicated.

Hopefully, this year I will make into ManneQUEENS before becoming a stumbling drunk outside. We'll see.

The following day is a "day of rest" for me, and I will most likely sleep in before heading off for this year's fun-zone number two. I've got a FREE hotel stay in the tower at Disney's Contemporary Hotel. It'll be a nice room with a balcony and plenty of vodka and a few visitors, I am sure.

As I wake up in the hotel on Saturday morning, I'll need to race home for a quick shower and to fix my "to go" bottle for the Magic Kingdom.

(The Magic Kingdom serves no alcohol, kiddies.)

After the day of magic is over, it's time for a night of pleasure. This evening I am planning on hitting Parliament House to hear Taylor Dayne sing one of my favorite old gay songs, "Naked Without You".

Sunday, more sleep.

While most of the thousands of visitors will be up all night at mammoth all-night circuit parties, this 35-year-old will be tuckered out. I know what goes on in Vegas, and they can all stay there. I've see it all and done it all.

I'm guessing Monday I will head over to Sea World to catch their newest Shamu show entitled, "Believe". I so like to think that it's an homage to Cher, but I have a feeling I'll be looking at an Orca whilst so sappy music and story a "kid who loves whales" has me grabbing for my tissue.

However, if it were an homage to Cher, that might be an experience that really opens the flood gates.

Anyway, I'm really looking forward to partying it up for Gay Days again this year. I only hope that I actually will be able to remember most of it this time.

UPDATE: Ritz-Carlton South Beach

2006-05-16T15:19:00.000-04:00

In true Ritz-Carlton fashion, the General Manager responded to my letter (see below: When Good Vacations Attack!) and he actually commented on virtually every point that I had mentioned.

The $200 in Ritz-Carlton Gift Certificates helped matters, too.

I've gone Cuckoo for Coco's Huffs...

2006-05-16T14:51:00.000-04:00

Many moons ago, I was subjected to watching a gay flick, called "Trick". The film's biggest star was Tori Spelling and she seemed to be having so much fun "actin' it up with all of her little fag friends" (as I put it 30 minutes into the DVD).

So, there I was watching this bland melodrama that I was "supposed" to connect with, as a homo.

The film was hijacked during a 60 second scene starring the piercingly hilarious Miss Coco Peru (Clinton Leupp) simply blew me away. I almost did a spit-take and pissed my pants all at the same time as Coco asked, "You ever have cum in your eye, Gabriel?" This was the most spot-on, deadpan, mockingly serious thing I had ever seen.

What ever happened to Coco?

The answer: plenty.

It turns out that Miss Coco Peru has been around for the past ten years (or so...sorry, Coco *kiss*) and has appeared all over film and TV. In fact, I just discovered that she (he?) was even a voice in DISNEY'S "The WILD"! Yet, another film I will have to tackle to hear this genius in action.

About a month ago, I was surfing YouTube.com and decided to relive that fabulous scene from "Trick". This led to even more surfing the net to find Coco Peru's site: www.MissCoco.com

There was a nice little "Contact Me" button on the bottom. That same drunken evening at home, the vodka led me to reach out and contact her.

She...or rather Clinton...emailed me back! Rather promptly, I might add. The humble tone of the response blew me away even more. An honest to God REAL person with REAL talent AND REAL MANNERS!

I was floored.

I wrote back...again with a response. Impossible.

I know that I'm gushing here, but I have new respect and admiration for Drag Alter-Egos and their creators...well, not all of 'em. But, this one's a winner, kids!

After the horrendous five-years I spent with my ex-boyfriend/bitch drag queen in Orlando, I was amazed by Clinton and Miss Coco.

I am indeed a fan. (Not a scary one, but a faithful one.)

Today, I've purchased a DVD copy of one of Coco's biggest starring vehicles, "Girls Will Be Girls". I can't wait until this DVD arrives from Amazon.com

It's going to be a piss my pants weekend for sure.

http://www.sropictures.com/girlswillbegirls/ <--Link to the movie's site.

Personal note to Clinton: If you read this...thanks for bringing big laughs back into my life. It's something that's been lacking for awhile! If you're ever in Orlando, please let me know. I'll hook you up with Disney for FREE...oh, wait...you were in 'the WILD', you've probably got that on your own.

I've got a Boo-Boo...

2006-05-08T15:42:00.000-04:00

In 2004, Central Florida was plagued by numerous hurricanes that threatened to change the entire landscape of the area. Once they slammed us, I never thought we would return to "normalcy".

We have.

Unfortunately, New Orleans hasn't been as lucky.

I'm still bewildered that our country has turned it's back on New Orleans. Sure there were benefits and fundraisers to help the city get back on it's feet. There have been large chunks of change coming from the Feds to help get everything back in order. Alas, the city is still crying for help and everyone is ignoring it like a child with Tourette's.

Meanwhile, back in Orlando we have remolded our plastic-fake society and we do not have to worry about dealing with the sadness the people in New Orleans (and MOST of the entire Gulf Coast of the USA) are experiencing.

Many of the unique treasures of the city are gone and will only remain in the memories of people who loved those hideaways.

I can relate locally in Orlando to that feeling, due to one place -- the Big Bamboo Lounge.

I miss my dear friend, the Boo, now more than ever. It was the dirty charm and whimsy that helped everyone leave pretention and simply have real honest-to-God dialogue. I became closer to many of my friends (and even my own Brother) thanks to the wonder that was the Boo.

Rumors had swirled after the hurricanes in Florida that the Boo MIGHT reopen. I was hoping and hoping. That day never came. (I even heard someone today say that they thought the place had reopened.)

Then, early this year, some transients (or maybe even heroin addicts -- or both) decided to take up residence in my "happy place". The Boo caught on fire and was ruined.

I've been hearing rumors that the place has reopened. I just can't imagine this to be true. Why, a simple look on www.bigbamboolounge.com will show you that a revival of the Boo seems impossible. My life, and that of the Boos regulars, will never be the same.

I'm sure it's not a balanced comparison to the shitty hand dealt to New Orleans, but it is an upsetting fact for me to deal with. I have Boo withdrawels every couple of weeks. I'd love to slide in next to the dusty old sofa -- you know the one right next to the pink bra hanging from the ceiling -- with my "Big Bamboo" drink in hand. The night would evaporate into laughter, charm, and warmth.

I'll never forget it.

If I ever became a multi-millionaire I would attempt to recreate every detail of the place to the best that money would buy. Just so others would learn to feel the magic of the Big Bamboo.

I can't imagine it would ever be the same.

Tonight, I'll be doing ANOTHER drive-by of the vacant shell of the Boo, with a hope and a memory full of fondness.

I've got the itch!

2006-04-18T11:06:00.000-04:00

I know that I just got back a couple of weeks ago from that lackluster trip to South Beach. But, I've really got the itch to get back to New York City again.

Beny will be travelling to Singapore to see his family in early July, and naturally the first leg of his flight takes him to New York City before departing for Singapore. This seems to be the perfect opportunity for me to join him for this first leg and spend a few days in New York with him. After that, he can head on to Singapore and I can head back home to Orlando (yes--crap brown for O-town).

Sounds good, in theory. Logistically, booking all of those multiple flights gets a little complicated. To complicate matters even more, we are looking to take the spoiled dog, Chopstick, with us. This severely limits the hotels we would be able to stay in while in NYC. I was really hoping to head back to the comfy andperfect Four Points by Sheraton in Chelsea. Unfortunately, this hotel does not allow pets. This hotel was a perfect base of operations for us last time, as it was rather close to the great shopping in SoHo and the new trendy shops in Chelsea. But, even better was it's proximity to the gay bars we fell in love with (Barracuda, the Rambles at the Park, etc.)!

Now, I've had to resort to looking for a different hotel. There are some with real potential, like the new "Night" hotel by the same folks that brought you "the Time" and "Dream" hotels. Very trendy. Very cool. But, the location moves us too close to the congestion of Times Square.

Another option is "the Regency". It's a Loews hotel and they are pet-friendly. But, it's way up on the Upper East Side. I'm afraid that area will roll up the sidewalks by 9pm!

Regardless, I'm not even sure I'm actually going to go through with this NYC this year. But, it sure is fun to "Dream" of "the Time" when I'll be laying my head on my pillow at "Night" after consuming the energy in NYC.

But, staying ten blocks away from the best burger in the world at Porter's in Chelsea...well, that's just torture!

When Good Vacations ATTACK!

2006-04-06T11:17:00.000-04:00

It sounded like a great plan to me...using large "points" collected on various credit cards to have a "free" vacation.

We (Beny & I) cashed in large numbers of points to stay at the Ritz-Carlton on South Beach, Miami.

The four-day weekend was cut down to three days, but we still went and were ready for uber-relaxation and pampering. Instead, we got lackluster service and dealt with overly pretentious morons on South Beach.

I used to visit South Beach regularly. I always had a great time. Beautiful city, beautiful beach, fine clothes, good food, and great partying.

This trip took on a decidedly different tone. I now despise South Beach and all that goes with it. Perhaps the place has become too big for it's britches? Regardless, the people were horrible. Unfriendly, clickish, and humorless. The employees at the Ritz-Carlton were bland, robotic, and pretentious.

You know the people in South Beach are bad when you find yourself commenting how INCREDIBLY friendly and helpful the people were in NEW YORK CITY! Seriously, we didn't encounter a bad apple at all in the "Big Apple".

We found the pits and seeds in South Beach.

South Beach manners aside, below is the letter that I will be mailing to the General Manager of the Ritz-Carlton. I think it speaks for itself.

------------------------------

Mr. Roos:

Please allow for me to share my recent experiences at the Ritz-Carlton, South Beach. While I was pleased with the property in general, I provide these details with the hope that you will review them with the appropriate leaders and staff for the responsible departments. I am currently employed at a large travel company in Orlando and do not feel comfortable recommending your hotel as a result of my stay.

Despite the established name of the hotel chain and the quality and comfort in the room, the service was quite simply not up to Ritz-Carlton standards to which I am accustomed. My traveling companion and I did, however, have a wonderful view from the top floor balcony -- beach to the right and bustling streets below and to the left.

Beginning with a tremendous challenge regarding the reservation process and the exclusion/failure to mention of a $250 non-refundable pet deposit (ritzcarlton.com), we were already considering a move to the nearby (and pet-friendly) Loews Hotel. However, after many calls to the hotel directly and to the Ritz-Carlton Customer Service, the pet deposit was waived. This was much appreciated gesture and an added assurance that we would receive the service we are accustomed to from Ritz-Carlton. (This pet deposit is not required at Ritz-Carlton hotels in Asia.)

On our arrival date of April 1, 2006, we called the hotel directly to book spa treatments. We were connected directly to the spa concierge desk and had decided to book a 50 minute Swedish Massage for that evening. We had specific requests of a Swedish Massage for each of us at approximately 5:00 pm. Unfortunately, nothing was available until 6:00 pm. Considering the short booking window, we agreed to this.

Upon check-in at the hotel at approximately 3:00pm, the front desk staff member (Guillermo) was simply gracious, elegant, and charming. This was a wonderful first impression! He is a stellar example of great service.

After shopping on Lincoln Road, we headed back to the hotel and down to the Spa. Upon check-in at 5:30 pm at the spa, there was no record of either of our 6:00 pm reservations for spa treatments. The spa hostess called the Coral Gables Ritz to see if our reservation had “accidentally” been booked at that location. The Ritz in Coral Gables also had no record of our reservation at 6:00 pm. To her credit, the hostess at the spa worked quickly to remedy the situation and called in someone (from City Massage) to give my companion a massage beginning at 6:45 pm. I was to receive a massage from a therapist that was willing to stay late at 7:30pm -- a full 90 minutes after our original non-reservation! I must elaborate here and point out that by the time both of us were finished with both of our treatments a full three hours had elapsed since our arrival time at the spa. This severely hindered our already limited time in Miami.

To complicate matters further, the massages were not Swedish Massages -- they were Deep Tissue. No apology was offered to us for these errors. The following morning, I felt bruising pain at various places on my body and head. This is something I have never experienced from any massage (including Deep Tissue) I am accustomed to at the Ritz-Carlton in Orlando. I was unable to function or leave the hotel room in the morning for a few hours.

Our original hotel reservation had been booked through American Express and we were promised a late check-out at 4:00 pm along with a complimentary breakfast. Overnight, the hotel had slid our folio under the door for review attached with a memo reminding us that checkout was at 12:00 pm. My companion called the front desk and asked for them to check their records because of what had been promised to us during the original booking process. The front desk assured us that neither a late check-out nor complimentary breakfast was a part of our reservation.

To verify, we placed a call to American Express and were eventually conference-called with the front desk to reiterate by the American Express representative as to what benefits we were to receive. The hotel staff would only then agree to a late check-out of 4pm. I was left to wonder why the front desk staff extended the courtesy of working with the American Express representative, but was unwilling to do so with us. At this point, we were dissatisfied with this Ritz-Carlton location and ready to check-out. If other companies are allowed to book the hotel, please ensure that both parties are in agreement as to what services will be provided.

The Ritz-Carlton has failed on many accounts:
--The reservation processes appear to be flawed and do not seem to be accurate or consistent with other Ritz-Carlton locations.
--The staff did not seem to be paying attention to simple details.
--With a few exceptions the hotel staff did not go beyond “robot mode” in terms of sincerity throughout the property.
--There were many errors and miscommunications.

--The stay should have been effortless, and for us it simply was not.

I do not agree, nor accept, having to negotiate simple situation after simple situation while staying at any Ritz-Carlton. I request that you please acknowledge the receipt of this letter and would appreciate your insight into these experiences of our stay.

Thank you for your prompt attention.

Sincerely,
tripaway2day (well, I'll use my real name, but you know...)

UPDATE! – 4/6/2006
Today, we reviewed our American Express statement online and have noticed a “no-show” charge of $250 for the spa at the Ritz in Biscayne. We have spoken with the accounting department for that property and they are investigating if the fee can be removed.

--------------------------------

Do yourself a favor. If you are looking for a beautiful beach in Florida, visit Clearwater.

Why?

2006-03-22T10:01:00.000-05:00

I think I've beaten my "Why?" gimmick to death. So that's gone. Don't ask why. ahem.

I've also been so swarmed/busy lately that I haven't been able to unleash the fury of the Kreativity Kraken. So, here it is in all of it's mini-ness -- another blog entry.

I confess. I wanked one out thinking of Chris Daughtry.

Who hasn't?

Why am I so happy?

2006-03-10T15:32:00.000-05:00

Isn't it interesting behavior? You know, shopping to cheer oneself up.

This time, however, I bought something out of necessity and it has made me oh-so-happy.

I finally got my "dream" car -- An Audi A4.

Sure an Audi A8 would be my ultimate dream car, or if I'm really going to go for it -- an Astin Martin Vanquish. But, those dreams most likely will not come true no matter how many stars I might wish upon.

Car shopping is quite a horrendous experience. I've been in so many dealerships and cars in the past month, I thought my legs and ass were going to fall off from overusage. (Keep your perverted comments to yourself, please.)

Luckily, I came across this 2005 Audi A4 1.8T (the T is for Turbo, I would later learn.)

Amazingly, this purchase has made my self-esteem rise back to "normalcy" and considering the deal that I got on this immaculate vehicle. I'll be normal for quite some time.

Why, I feel like hot shit. Damn!

Why a Scion?

2006-02-28T13:52:00.000-05:00

I've been car shopping lately. I honestly can't decide what to buy.

For some reason, I've been consistently drawn to the Scion tC.

However, everytime I've been to the dealership, they never actually have one that I can sit in and test drive!

Any car kudos or suggestions from all of your new car owners?

Just don't be like Beny and ask, "Why a Scion?"

Why 35?

2006-01-24T15:09:00.000-05:00

It's official...had the birthday over the weekend.

35 in gay years is equivalent to 50 in hetero years.

Looking at where I am in life at 35, there are many things that get me down. You know, dead-end job. Paycheck-to-paycheck bank account. Credit card debt. Beat up 1996 Saturn. I could go on and on, but I won't.

The positives are varied. I'm happy to have found someone special to spend my life with. I happy with the unique experiences I have had being a VIP Tour Guide. I'm happy with the fact that I own my home. I'm generally happy.

But, at 35, I feel like the "general happiness" might not be enough.

Most frightening for me, is that half of my life has eclipsed and I still haven't been able to get out an "see the world".

While I have fun seeing the facsimile "world" that Orlando offers via it's theme parks, I still have a tremendous yearning to get out and see the real deal.

For Christmas, I had asked for enough cash to go to Vegas. Instead, I got some clothes. Fine.

I'm just worried that I'll complete my time on Earth and never really get to see and do all of the things I had wished.

Why wasn't I a travel magazine photographer?

Why am I sad?

2005-12-28T14:35:00.000-05:00

Discounting the Holiday blues...
the extra ten holiday pounds...
the lackluster haul on Christmas day...
the rejection of the new job...

Why am I sad?
Here's the biggest blow to me this Holiday season:

Fire damages 'Big Bamboo'
Now closed, it was Disney cast hangout

Susan Jacobson
Sentinel Staff Writer
December 28, 2005

KISSIMMEE -- The future of the Big Bamboo Lounge, a quirky bar on the West U.S. Highway 192 tourist strip that closed late last year, is even more up in the air after a fire nearly destroyed the building last week.

Osceola County fire officials are calling the bar a "total loss," though the walls didn't collapse.

One of the owners, Nancy Duggan, said Tuesday that although she would still like to reopen the "Boo," she doesn't know what's going to happen. Duggan said she hadn't seen the lounge or a Fire Department report about the damage, although she plans to visit the bar this week.

"I'm just so sad about it," said Duggan, the daughter of Bruce Muir, who bought the property in 1977. "It's just a heartbreaking thing. I wanted to see it stay open all along."

Muir, who lived in Kissimmee's Orange Gardens, died in February 1999.

Housed in what was once a doctor's house, the Big Bamboo became a hangout for Walt Disney World employees and curious tourists.

It was decorated with Disney employee name tags, business cards, newspaper clippings and foreign money and featured swing and jazz music and bartenders wearing Hawaiian shirts.

Only cash was accepted, and there was no air conditioning. Out front sat a vintage military ambulance and a watchtower.

Disney animators sometimes entertained other patrons by drawing Mickey Mouse and other characters on cocktail napkins.

"It was unique," Duggan said. "It was almost like a club where people met their friends."

Muir's widow owns half the bar, and Duggan and her sister also have shares, according to a probate settlement agreement. The Sentinel was unable to reach Glenda Muir, who has a Vero Beach address, and Duggan said she does not respond to messages or correspondence from the sisters. That leaves the property in apparent legal limbo.

The Osceola County Fire Department received a 911 call about 5 p.m. Dec. 18 saying flames and smoke were coming from the Big Bamboo Lounge, said Larry Krause, a county spokesman.A fire report says homeless people trying to keep warm may have started the fire. Clothing was found inside, indicating people were living in the vacant building at 4849 W. U.S. 192, Krause said. Five county fire engines and one each from Orange County and Kissimmee helped battle the flames, he said.

The fire was under control in 15 minutes, according to the report. Damage was particularly severe in the rear of the building, where flames came through the roof, the report states.

It's unclear whether the building -- which also was damaged during the 2004 hurricanes -- can survive the most recent assault.

Some of my favorite nights were spent pounding back 'Big Bamboo' drinks (made with rum, rum, rum, and stuff). I learned big secrets about dear friends and family members. I had wonderfully drunken therapy sessions.

All of it took place in 'the Boo'.

Of course, if I were to win the lottery, I would try to recreate it...right down to the dusty old Christmas Tree in the corner with the Billy Graham biography beneath it.

When cherished places like this vanish, I know that I'm not the only one to wonder...

...why?

Why Will?

2005-12-15T09:45:00.000-05:00

Okay...I've got to throw this out there. It's been nagging at me for oh...the last ten years or so. It's not a personal attack on 'him'. They are MY FEELINGS and I'm never going to apologize for them.

I fell in love with Will.

I honestly can't remember how I even met him. What I can remember is how I wasn't able to control him. I remember how hilarious he was. I remember how incredibly sexy and smooth his almond skin was to touch. I remember how amazingly soft those lips were to kiss. I remember the infectuous laugh. The general insanity. I remember the heartache.

The heartache.

Crying over him. Loving him and being semi-loved in return.

I remember him wanting me to 'do him' in the days where I had never done anyone and vowed not to ever do so until I was in a commited relationship. He could have been "the one" easily. Love like I felt for him was amazing. I still feel warm when I think of him.

I also curse him. He's back in my life. He's a quasi-friend again. I feel like a semi-friend and semi-loved all over again.

He did a fine job all of those years ago of making me feel like I could be 'the one' for him. The one to make him settle down. The one he would love to grow old with, but on the flip side he was still fucking around with everyone behind my back. But, he made me feel this way with his general smooth-talking and soft-lip kissing manipulation.

He describes in great detail of his conquests with 'Lifeguard' and 'Randy' and how they both maipulated his little heart. He remembers every detail. I was around in those days. What hurts most is that I was a 'Sidebar' to him. I merely occupied his time and I don't think I made as big of an impact on him as he did on me.

I cherished him. I floundered around trying to be perfect for him.

I lost.

He claims that he doesn't remember much of his time with me. That he was extremely messed up on drugs and everything else. A convenient memory loss? Perhaps.

All I know is I was there through many of the things he describes with a laser-sharp accuracy. He describes friends at the gay Denny's. Chances are, I was one of those friends...sitting there at the table thinking that I was more than just a friend. Watching him work his magical intoxication on these guys right in front of my oblivious face.

I was a fool to ever fall for him.

How can I ever get over him? Hearing his voice today makes me melt. The laugh. The raspiness. The sexiness. The innuendo that effortlessly slides off of his tongue.

My heart still skips a beat.

Why Will?

Why am I hanging onto these thoughts?

2005-12-12T10:47:00.000-05:00

Today is the day, I'm going to dump some shit 'out there', just to clear my head. Some of it might make complete sense. Some of it is just for me.

Okay? Here we go!

The RENT-adulation has finally worn off, well that is until February when the DVD gets released!
Funny how you can talk to someone and they act like they are more than willing to hang out with you, but when you finally see them in a local bar they do not approach. Keeping their distance makes me doubt the sincerity.
Seeing another older (and and respected) ex-coworker out the other night really provided me with a wide mix of emotions. I've never felt closer to him. For him to build me up as "great at my job" did so much for my delicate ego. He's a gem.
Dear friends are not always so dear. Sometimes they promise to devote time with you, and then they neglect you. Leaving you to visit a very crowded Magic Kingdom all by yourself. Seeing all of the happy families together during the holiday season made me feel very lonely.
Sleeping all day on Sunday with my dog made me feel un-lonely. He makes a good pillow.
I hate cold weather.
I still haven't watched any of the Lord of the Rings films, but I did catch about 15 minutes of one of them yesterday. I thought it was unnecessarily violent.
MADtv has been crowned my 'King of Comedy'. What the hell has happened to Saturday Night Live?

It continuously blows.

Why haven't I had a Whataburger, yet?
I'm nervous about my 30 minute meeting with the Director/VP of the my potential new employer tomorrow. I'll have my fingers crossed.
Is it wrong that I don't always answer my phone?
I found an amazing remix of 'One Song Glory' by some guy named Ryan Link. The Buffalo Bill remix is wonderful!
I had much more fun than I anticpated last Friday night at my 1st Annual Secretary Christmas Party. I work with some great people. Too bad I dislike where I currently work. Too bad that I hope to be in a new role next year...no 2nd Annual party for me.
The cold weather has made my hand injury/repair hurt like hell.
Still need to buy Dad a gift. What do you get a Dad for Christmas?
The Pam Anderson Friar's Club Roast was full of VERY harsh slams. Poor ancient and amazing Bea Arthur took a beating.

Why, that's all for today. Thanks. I feel moderately better.

Why are they so divided?

2005-11-23T11:37:00.000-05:00

Movie critics.

Love them? Hate them? Believe them? Doubt them?

Even a discussion on movie critics would leave the opinionated completely divided.

Why does the movie critic's opinion even matter? If we think we want to see something, we should go see it, right?

Enter, RENT

As you all know, I've been pining to see this movie ever since I had learned of it's production and had seen the Broadway show in July. So, regardless of what the critics say, I'm going to see this film.

Chances are, I'm even going to like it.

However, the movie critics have either trashed RENT for various reasons (that I'll try to capture below), or hailed it as one of the best, most energetic movie musicals to be made in ages.

Why are they so divided?

Well, I think there are many factors:

Some of them simply don't understand the fact that this is a musical. It's a stage show on film. They whine that the characters unnaturally break out into song at ridiculous moments. Citing that people don't do this in "real life". Well, duh! Why is it people accept it on a Broadway stage, but not on film? It's a freakin' movie of a stage show. These critics are dumb asses.
Some of them have seen the show on Broadway and hated it, therefore they are predisposed to hate them film, as well.
Some of them have seen the show and realize that the movie has captured it "true to it's original version". So, they like it. They get it.
Others think this movie and subject matter is dated because it takes place in 1989. Um, hello? It's a period piece. Just as 'Finding Neverland' takes place in the early 1900's, this film takes place in 1989. Why is this an issue? Put your 1989 hat on and enjoy it for all of it's late 1980's glory!

I really could go on and on. But, I won't. What I will say is that the love/hate relationship with Jonathan Larson's brilliant work occurred even amongst the theater community. I'm talking Broadway, not Hollywood.

So in the truest RENT tradition, critics will either love it or hate it.

One thing is certain to me...while the work isn't polished perfection, it's remarkably passionate and filled with beautiful melodies and lyrics. The performers are so close to the source material that their performance WILL suck you in and you will all be touched, just as I was when I saw the show at the Nederlander in NYC.

I will be there. I'm so glad that there is 'No Day But Today'. I'm so glad that I'll be fired up with excitemnt at 7:45pm tonight, when that first chord of 'Seasons of Love' kicks off the film.

Why, those little RENTheads in the theater better not ruin the movie for me by mooing or cheering over key moments. I might be asking myself...

...why didn't I just wait for this on DVD?

Why is it hurting?

2005-11-21T11:01:00.000-05:00

Ever get so drunk that you injure yourself and don't remember why or how?

I have.

Saturday started out innocent enough. Hanging out with friends, drinking. Good time so far. Then we decided to head over to the Parliament House. During the walk from where we parked the car, William and I got into a fist-fight. Not because we were anrgy with one another, but just for the hell of it. As we punched each other's arms and chests, I was laughing like a fool.

The night became an ever-increasing blur filled with me puking in the ladies' restroom and me asking some gorgeous, shirtless latino boy to become our houseboy. The fun finally came to an end with me and Donna drunkenly giggling around my condo complex at about 6:30am.

Then came Sunday.

I woke up feeling battered and bruised. Quite literally. I have four horrendous bruises on my arms from where William had punched me and pinched me. Every color of the bruise rainbow is now etched on my arms and chest.

But, my leg. Ouch! It's a sharp pain just below my right knee on the outside of the leg. Going up and down stairs is almost impossible.

I don't know if I simply twisted it, hurt a tendon, or did I fracture something?

Should I see a doctor? I don't know. I'm going to try to go another day or two and hope that the pain subsides.

Why did I finish my Oxycodones on Friday instead saving them for the pain of today?

Why tapas?

2005-11-17T09:36:00.000-05:00

It all started when Beny and I met that manipulative, sad, and lonely Franky Franky. You know, the homewrecker that likes to destroy people's relationships because he wants them to be as miserable as he is. (Sidebar: He's at it again with another friend of ours...)

Anyway, it all started when we met him. He took us to two fabulous tapas restaurants in Tampa. One called Sangrias and the other Ceviche.

Both had excellent food, beautiful servers, fun and interesting atmospheres, and tipsy-inducing Sangria.

Ever since then, I have been on the quest in Orlando to find such a great tapas-style dining experience.

Nothing has come close.

Last night, I had the pleasure of taking Beny and William out to the little Disney-designed town of Celebration. We went specifically on my quest to try another tapas restaurant. This one was the Columbia Restaurant.

A little history here. The original Columbia opened in Tampa's Ybor City in 1905 by a family man from Cuba. The operation has remained a family operation ever since. The Columbia has also spawned numerous duplicates in Sarasota, St. Peterburg, Clearwater, St. Augustine, and Celebration.

Based on my previous Tampa tapas experiences, and considering the Columbia had it's first locale in Tampa, I had high hopes.

Would this be the end-all on the search for tempting tapas?

Nope.

What we encountered was a strange seating hostess. A waiter that seemed to have come from the kitchen as an emergency back-up waiter. Food that simply had no wow factor. Finally, Sangria that had no punch in it's fruit juices.

Overall, the experience was okay. But, never again.

This leaves me with a desire to head back over to Winter Park to give Ole Ole a chance. However, I haven't heard too many great things about Ole Ole.

What I HAVE heard good things about, are the kind words being spoken on my behalf to help me secure the new job. While I still haven't received the "offer"...I have high hopes.

Why isn't the phone ringing?
Pins and needles...pins and needles...

Why, you'll see boys...

2005-11-16T12:05:00.000-05:00

The film version of RENT is one week away from it's premiere (November 23rd). I'm so into this, that I'm having RENT-fever. This, despite the fact that I've been cranking Madonna's Confessions on a Dance Floor for the past day and a half.

I'm torn...I want to absorb myself in Madge's fabulous musical offering (purchased for a low low $9.72 at Wal-Mart), but at the same time I can't seem to tear myself away from my RENT movie soundtrack.

My CD player's eject button is working overtime as my Attention Deficit Disorder is causing me to bounce between these CDs.

I'm also excited at two other "happenings":

It appears that a decision is about to be made regarding the job I interviewed for a few weeks ago. The decision must be a difficult one, but I know for a fact that some calls are being made to various salaried-types to determine whether I am the favorable choice, or not. While I'm extremely nervous at the prospect of moving into a new job, I believe that it's exactly the medicine I need to rejuvenate my life.

Crossing my fingers.

Beny has received info that his boss has made some headway on creating a new salaried position for him. Hopefully, in the next week or two, Beny will be receiving a big promotion.

If both of these things pan positively out next week, I'm sure I will be on top of the world...

Confessions.

RENT.

WDI.

$$$.

Here's to hoping that I have lots to be thankful for on this coming Thanksgiving Day!

Why, my Mom's stuffing should be extra yummy this year.

Why am I so "Mean"?

2005-11-14T08:31:00.000-05:00

This one goes out to The Peach.

I had a pointless weekend full of lounging around the house, watching oodles of television, sleeping WAY too much, and boozing it up at night.

For some odd reason, I feel absolutely horrible this morning. In fact, most of the weekend I have felt like "ass". Is my body telling me that it's time to take a turn for the better? Quit smoking? Quit drinking?

Perhaps. Perhaps. Perhaps.

Anyway, back to the weekend of excess slothitude.

I was able to FINALLY catch the movie "Mean Girls". The Peach loves this film and has pushed for me to see it since day one. Saturday night, I finally caught it on Showtime in HD. Bonus. I DVRed it and I'm glad that I did, because this movie was hilarious. It was one of those "this is why I hated high school" movies that takes the high school experience and exaggerates it to the millionth degree. Despite the exaggeration, it's also amazingly accurate. Go figure. But, funny it is.

Yoda was also on screen this wekend.

I finally watched Star Wars: Episode III.

Liked it, I did not.

Visually stunning...Hayden Christianson is a morsel...but, follow it I could not. My friend William had to explain much of the plot to me, since my Attention Deficit Disorder was on overload due to all of the distracting visual effects.

I mean, there were some things that I liked about it...mmm, Hayden...but, on the whole I felt that it was lacking the heart and emotion of the original Star Wars films.

I mean, when Yoda was a Muppet, he was adorable, witty, and cool. Now that he's CGI he just looks like a green anus and looks pissed off all of the time.

Redeeming aspect of CGI? When R2-D2 blew oil over some "bad robots" and then ignited the shit on fire. Robot Flambe.

The Peach raved and raved about this film and how amazing it was. I'm not sure what he liked about it, but it wasn't fun for me. In fact, I didn't find it nearly as entertaining as was "Mean Girls".

Of course, I made The Peach watch John Waters' "A Dirty Shame" and he didn't seem to enjoy that. I guess we are even by all accounts.

Tomorrow's the day that Madonna's newest CD sensation hits the shelves at your local Virgin Megastore. Make sure you purchase a copy.

Regret it, you will not.

Why can't I stop talking like Yoda?

Why what?

2005-11-11T13:16:00.000-05:00

Ever feel "empty"?

I do.

In over my head...swimming in the shallow end of the cement pond.

Big hopes. Big dreams.

Big failures.

Why?

Why this and why that...

2005-11-08T13:41:00.000-05:00

Why, if you go to Mtv.com via this link:(http://www.mtv.com/bands/az/madonna/1002963/album.jhtml)
you can listen to Madonna's newest album, "Confessions on a Dance Floor". You can find out why this album...

...KICKS ASS!

Why do I not feel bad about 'accidentally' blowing off a meeting I had with one of my managers to go to lunch?

Why do my boyfriends always have 'trust issues' with me, when I feel that I am quite trustworthy?

Why does my partner feel the need to get a car that is WAY out of our current price sitch-i-ation?

Why did my new misfiring friend disappear?

Why does Madonna's new album kick ass so much? It just does!

Why is Chopstick two months overdue for his Bordatella shot?

Why did my mind almost explode when I watched a show on PBS about something called 'String Theory'? If you know what is is, I'm sure you can relate.

Why do I have to wait 15 more days to see the RENT movie? Arrrgggh!

Why haven't I heard any new dance club remixes of "Seasons of Love" from RENT?

Why has my back been hurting so much lately?

Why do I have to wait so long to find out if they are going to give me the new job that I want so badly?

Why did Yankee Candle Company reject my offer to meet with them to discuss my new proposal for a new product line?

Why won't I tell YOU what my brilliant idea is/was?

Why does everybody knock Jaws 3-D? I always kind of liked it.

Why won't those lotto balls bounce into the pattern that I select every Wednesday and Saturday? Why, I could use a few million dollars.

Why did Terri Hatcher cry on last Sunday's Desperate Housewives? Screw the plot line, girl was going for an Emmy.

Why did I have a strange unmemorable dream that featured Jeff Lindberg in a starring role? Especially, since I haven't spent any time with him in YEARS? Most likely, it was due to his blog entry detailing his Q-tipping Earwax Flushing. Something I've never had done, but considering how often I Q-tip the ears, I'm sure I will have to get done.

Why do I fear Avain Flu? Why the hell do the news idiots call it the Avian Bird Flu, when Avain and Bird are the same thing?

Why give up?

2005-11-04T08:43:00.000-05:00

Last night was challenging for me.

I'll get to the story in a moment, but first I've got to say that I've got this big "drama cloud" that follows me around. I don't know why I'm always at the epicenter of drama. One of my friends told me once that I simply love it. The solid fact is that I don't. Those that truly know me, know that I'm all about stress-free "happy times". I avoid arguments and negative situations like the plague.

Somehow the drama manages to find me and thrusts it's cock (and balls) down my throat.

On my way home from work yesterday, I decided to call a few people to see what everyone was planning for the weekend. Nobody answered. Instantly, I began to doubt my friends' loyalty. The reality is that most of them were probably still at work.

I knew that one of my best friends wasn't at work...I'll call him "James" to protect his privacy.

You see, James recently got terminated by Mickey Mouse. Not very "magical" after all, is it? I won't go into why I personally feel that he was wrongfully terminated. What I will go into is that I knew he would answer his phone, since he's currently unemployed AND single.

Unemployed AND single obviously do not mix well, because my drive-time conversation quickly turned into a suicide prevention hotline.

James talked about how he doesn't know what he wants to do in life anymore. No job really interests him. He also feels that his limited education will lead him nowhere. He's now in his thirties and he feels that his life up to this point has been simply irrelevant...pointless.

His quest for a man has been challenging due to his high standards and the sub-par quality of the candidates. The Orlando dating pool -- he informs me -- is full of psychotic selfish vapid losers. All people that he has never had or made a real connection with (except for the empty sex he so freely has with many of them).

I talked him down from his metaphorical building ledge for a short time, as I arrived home at my condo. I had to let him go, but promised I would call him later in the evening.

After walking Chopstick and prepping myself with three glasses of my Raspberry Smirnoff and Sierra Mist Free, I had the liquid courge to call him back.

It was a rough call.

I tried my best to inspire him to embrace the small things that make him happy. I asked him to take time and really look at his surroundings...nature. I asked him to think about all of the fun times he has had, like our recent trip to St. Augustine.

On the career front, I told him that he really needs to figure out what inspires him and attempt to marry that passion with a career. He's a huge environmentalist, a believer in the positive integration of technology and diversity displayed in Science Fiction, and loves world cultures. He loves art and hates math.

I made a wide-sweeping variety of job suggestions...trying to ignite the light in him.

During the course of the conversation, he made mentions of suicide at least ten times. From the "I just want to sleep and never wake up...I love sleeping." to the "I'm just going to eat something poisonous and die because I just don't see the point in any of this anymore."

Like I said, it was rough.

At around 11pm, I decided I was going over to his house to go on "suicide watch".

After negotiating with the Mrs., I finally got "permission" to go.

Once I got there, I found him in surprisingly good spirits. Wine, that is. And the "Refreshing White" FRANZIA seemed to have made him happier. I'd also like to think that my appearance at his abode made him happier, too.

He feels lost and has no one "there" for him. I'm glad I was able to be that person last night.

After a few more glasses of wine and a kinder, gentler conversation, I told him that I needed to go to sleep because I had to work the next morning.

There was a humorous drunken fumbling as he attempted to find me some shorts to sleep in. None of which fit me. Since I wasn't wearing underwear with the nylon athetic pants I had on, I knew I'd need shorts for comfort to sleep in. After trying to get four different pairs of shorts over my giant butt, I gave up. I told him, "Screw it, you've seen me naked a million times...I'll be sleeping nude."

Stop right there, bitches...this was not a "move" for me to attempt to get some action. Assholes.

I climbed into bed and he stripped down to his nothingness and joined me.

I turned away from him to begin my slumber and he quickly "spooned" me and put his arm over me and held my chest. I think this is all James really needed -- comfort and security.

5am the alarm clock woke me up for my return to the real world. Where was James? He wasn't in the bed! Holy Shiite Muslims! Did he "off" himself while I was sleeping?

Nah...it turns out that I was snoring like a freight train and he went to sleep on the sofa.

I sat next to him as he lay on the sofa and caressed his chest and hair a little while. He thanked me for "being there" for him and told me that it really meant a lot to him.

Mission accomplished...for now.

I gave him a quick peck on the lips and stumbled down to my car cursing the fact that I was up at 5am and had to go to work. I made it home by 5:25am and quickly climbed into bed with the Indonesian love of my life and nodded off for one extra hour of sleep.

I'm tired. Exhausted, really. It doesn't matter...

...why, I'll do just about anything for my dearest friends.

Why no news is hopefully good news...

2005-11-02T14:52:00.000-05:00

This morning, I did my regular routine of schlepping into work, powering up my PC and filtering through my emails.

There it was staring me in the face...in red letters none-the-less!

It was an email from the Human Resources Manager from the department that I just interview with...yikes!

Hesitantly opening the email, I was glad to see that she was notifying me that a decision had not been made for the position. In fact, it would be two additional weeks until they can make up their minds.

Why do I hear the music from "A Chorus Line"?

(God, I hope I get it...)

Why wouldn't I shut up?

2005-10-28T11:24:00.000-04:00

I had a "second" interview for a position with a portion of my company that I have always had a tremendous amount of respect and interest.

Yesterday was "Round 2" and I was praying that it would go as wonderfully as "Round 1" did.

This was to be a panel interview with three people that I've never met before.

We clustered around a small round table. As I kept trying to keep my hands from sweating and trembling, I smiled and feigned my "delight" at meeting each of these characters. The rapid-fire questioning began and so did my mouth...digging holes the size of Pam Anderson's vagina and leaving gaps in my responses the size of the one on Lauren Hutton's front teeth.

I talked and talked and tried to stay "on topic", but with such generic questions, there was too much room for me to meander.

The dead silence after each response certainly did not help, either.

In "Round 1", the interview was warm and cordial. There was chatty and witty banter that made me feel like I could really shine.

"Round 2" was a poker table full of poker faces.

The question that really killed me is: "Where do you see yourself in the next five to ten years?"

This question used to be so easy for me five to ten years ago, but now that the company I work for has so wonderfully crushed all of those hopes and dreams, I have Nahtaklu as to what I want to do with my life.

The honest answer should've been about how I see myself as a lottery winner and living happily in my homes in NYC, South Beach, Orlando, and Las Vegas and tavelling the globe sight-seeing until I can't see any more sights.

But, I'm sure they intended for my response to be "career-oriented". With that, I drew a blank...career? What career? I'm simply existing to pay my bills.

So, I waxed on and waxed off endlessly about my original goals and how my experiences were priming me for a position that I wasn't sure I really wanted any longer. (Not the position I was interviewing for, mind you, but the position I used to think I would be doing by this point in my life.)

I ended up telling them that currently, I had no career path...I'm sort of a drifter at the moment. Did that just come out of my mouth? Shit!

Now who would want to hire a drifter? I certainly wouldn't.

Why the hell did I say that?????????

Why 50 questions?

2005-10-25T11:12:00.000-04:00

Because, I have 50 answers!

1. What year was the best year of your life? 1992 sticks in my brain for some reason. Must be because that's when I first moved away from home and finally had some freedom.

2. One animal or insect that Noah should have left off the ark? Are you kidding? I live in Florida...mosquitos, roaches, gators, snakes...

3. Do you make a wish before blowing out your birthday candles? Yes -- and I'm not going to tell you what it is.

4. Do you generally open your bills on the day that you receive them? I don't open them at all. I let Beny open them and tell me when I need to pay them...how's that for responsibility?

5. How many pillows are on your bed? Two...his and his.

6. Favorite ice cream flavor? Dulce de Leche

7. What is the most dominate color in your wardrobe? Gray

8. Have you ever seen a ghost? 999 of them in the Haunted Mansion, you know...

9. Would you rather go to a carnival or circus? Carnival...I love the seediness and if they have the "freak shows" BONUS!

10. Favorite meal: breakfast, lunch, or dinner? Dinner.

11. Your favorite fictional animal? Harvey Birdman: Lawyer

12. Have you ever flown first-class? Yes.

13. Would you go on a reality show? Absolutely.

14. Are you more optimistic or pessimistic about the future? Pessimistic...it's all turning to shit as we speak.

15. Pancakes or waffles? 'Waffle House' waffles

16. If you could own a home anywhere in the world, where would it be? Brooklyn Heights, NYC

17. Your favorite Soup of the Day? Broccoli and Cheese. Chili.

18. What site is a must see for all visitors to your city? For me, it's all about Epcot and "Drinking Around the World".

19. Can you recommend a good restaurant in your city? Many: Stonewood Grill, Kahuna Grill, Hue, Jiko, Boma, Flying Fish, Artist's Point, Cafe Tu Tu Tango...somebody stop me...I love eatin'!

20. You go to the zoo; What is the one animal that you want to see? I love to see the silverback Gorillas...so expressive.

21. Potatoes, rice, or pasta; Which is your favorite? I think I'm into the potatoes.

22. What is the best movie that you’ve seen this year? I recently watched "I Heart Huckabees" and enjoyed it...although it's a tad too "heady".

23. One of your favorite books when you were a child? Shel Silverstein's "Where the Sidewalk Ends".

24. What in your life are you most grateful for? I'm sure most people will say, "my parents" and I'll echo that one, but I'd also say my best friends Donna and William, who have always stood by me.

25. You are home alone and use the bathroom; do you close the door? I don't even close the door when I have guests...unless it's going to be a paint-peeler.

26. What is your favorite small appliance? Cameras.

27. Salty snacks or sweet treats? Salty.

28. Are you usually a little early, a little late, or right on time? I'm always early and rarely late.

29. What is the most daring thing that you have ever done? I've done many things that involve nudity.

30. Have you ever met someone famous? Yes. Too many to care.

31. What was one of your favorite games as a child? I liked playing "Chutes and Ladders", mainly for the "Chutes".

32. At what age have you looked your best? I'd say 31.

33. One person that never fails to make you laugh? Donna Mitchell -- girl is nuts.

34. What was the first music that you ever bought? Devo's "Whip It".

35. If you could change one thing about your family life when you were a child, what would it be? Being 'out' with them from the beginning, rather than cause so much pain down the road.

36. What is the one thing that you cook that always receives compliments? White Cannellini Bean Dip with Oregano-sprinkled Pita Chips. I also get compliments on my "Vietnamese-spiced Pork Chops".

37. From what news source do you receive the bulk of your news? The net. Google News. Local news, WFTV Channel 9.

38. In the last calendar year, how many people have you told that you love them? Five...no names, sorry.

39. Who recieved your first kiss? My first boyfriend, Peter Ames.

40. The single most important quality in a mate? Humor and simplicity. I found 1/2 of that and 1 out of 2 isn't that bad.

41. What do you value most in a relationship? Romantic talks/walks in beautiful surroundings. The moment when you realize for the millionth time how much you love him...or her.

42. Do you believe that you have a soulmate? Yes.

43. Do you consider yourself well organized? I can be. Mostly.

44. On average, how many times a day do you look at yourself in the mirror? Hmmm...seven?

45. Did you ever make a prank phone call? Oh yes. Many.

46. What one quality do you seek in a friend? Humor and smart conversation. Patience. Loving me no matter what.

47. Have you ever killed an animal? Insect, yes. Animal, no.

48. When you were twelve years old, what did you want to be when you grew up? Architect.

49. Do you believe in a afterlife? Yes.

50. What would you like to accomplish with the remaining years of your life? To not have to work any longer and travel, travel travel.

Why, time does heal wounds...

2005-10-25T09:04:00.000-04:00

As I suspected, Beny has finally cooled off. Once he arrived home last night, all was fine. Stubborn Gayasians.

Why he's a poet AND he knows it!

There's this dude that was highlighted on my company's intranet portal that really caught my eye. His photo was minimalist and sexy. Then, once I read the profile that was posted...well, this dude's background was so interesting. I mean, any guy that specialized in "Feminist Theory" in college...interesting, right?

Then, there was the "vibe" issue. I was getting a gay "vibe". I didn't even know this guy, but I sensed that something was up with him. I needed to find out more.

Later in the profile, it was mentioned that he also had a blog that contained some of his poetry. Well, I just HAD to find out more about that, too. I also wanted to follow the breadcrumbs to discover more about this enigma.

I emailed him, complimenting him on the interesting PR piece and he was nice enough to respond. Since then, I've discovered much more:

The official title of his blog:
Misfires & Whatnot: The Life & Times of a Hot-House Flower
The ever-continuing account of a "man out of time"......mostly just pure craziness. Handle it.

Here's the link: http://misfires.blogspot.com

Go there and read his introspective, warm-hearted, sensual and sassy poetry.

While there, be sure to click the links and discover his sister-site that details some odd things, such as his unsolicited dreams about Jake Gyllenhaal that ends up as Katie Holmes.

This boy's a creative energy force...the world can use a few more like him.

I also feel lucky to call him a cherished friend...while we've never even met except via emails and chat.

So strange, huh? I know!

Why you, too, must discover Mr. Alarid.

Why yes, Wilma...it's an update!

2005-10-24T09:28:00.000-04:00

Saturday, I got the itch to get out of town.

My good friend, William agreed to go with me (since Beny had to work).

William and I piled into his car and headed for St. Augustine. Always relaxing and always beautiful, we had a wonderful time. Of course, I had my yummy Shrimp Po'Boy at the Florida Cracker Cafe. Yummsies.

About 6:3pm, we decided to head to Jacksonville. Too close not to go, ya know?

We arrived in Jacksonville, where I always have a horrible time trying to locate my favorite little hole in the wall bar, Club 3D.

We did finally stumble upon another gay bar, 616 (after 90 minutes of driving around). Once we pounded down two Long Island Iced Teas and grabbed the Contax Guide (our weekly gay rag with maps and ads for anything and everything homo), we got back into the car and headed to another club, Metro.

I had been to Metro once before, but was in such a state that I really only remember the parking lot.

At Metro, more Iced Teas and the non-Metro (nor-Cosmo) drag show began.

Gigglefest.

Two of the performers where as rural ghetto as I had expected. However, two of the fine ebony queens were way too good for Jacksonville and I enjoyed them a bunch.

I had turned off my cell to conserve battery power. Since I had spoken with Beny prior to arriving at Metro, I assumed all was a-okay.

Wrong.

During the evening, William and I got completely hammered. Beny had been calling. Sometime around 2:30am, I called him. Lecture time.

"Why did you turn your phone off?"

Leaving Metro, William was passed out in the car. I was weaving and thankfully not heaving. We pulled of at some exit from I-95, drove-thru Whataburger, and plopped down $62 for a shitty room at Super 8 hotel.

I called Beny. Totally pissed off at me. Hung up on me.

Three voicemails from him:

(3:20am) If you are drunk, you should get a hotel room just to be safe.
(3:21am) You fucker...I know what you are up to...mother fucker
(3:23am) I'm leaving you. I'll be gone when you get home.

I called him. It was brief. He stated that he was pissed at me and accused me of going to a bathhouse in Jacksonville...while that was a great idea, I didn't do it.

Arrived back in Orlando yesterday around 1:30pm. Beny had already left for work.

It felt good to be home, but my house is not really a home when Beny's not around. It's even worse when he's mad at me.

I was in bed by 9:30pm last night (because I had to be at work at 7am due to Hurricane Wilma). Beny got home at 10:30pm and made a bunch of noise but never greeted me at all. He slept in the guest bedroom.

I left this morning at 6:10am. Still haven't spoken with Beny. I did write him a little note and left it on the counter. By the time I get home today, he'll be gone to work again.

I'm rather thankful...because I'm so afraid to talk to him.

Drama is rearing it's ugly head. I just pray that the time apart will allow him to cool down.

Why, only time will tell.

Why anxiety?

2005-10-21T11:24:00.000-04:00

With Beny's asylum being granted by the INS Judge, I experienced great joy this week. However, I'm still on pins and needles.

I have an interview this afternoon.

I haven't interviewed for anything in seven or eight years.

Have I been preparing? Quite simply, no. I think I'm a good enough bullshitter at this point that I should be able to wing it. I know the questions...those trap-setting questions with no right or wrong answer. I'm ready for those.

Basically, my goal is to simply be my normal witty self, throw in a dash of that old church-boy charm that I used to display, and pepper my answers with the latest and greatest business buzzwords.

I've wanted to work for this particular company since I was seven and playing with Legos. Quite frankly, I've been preparing for this interview almost all of my life, so I say BRING IT ON!

I've received inside info that I'm one of the prime candidates (in the top five of fourteen -- originally 55 applicants). That alone makes me feel good enough to be comfortable as I head into the interview.

The Clonazepams will also help me relax.

I feel pretty good about this one. If I fuck it up, I'll be asking myself...

Why? Why? Why?

Why "After Hours"?

2005-10-18T10:43:00.000-04:00

Goodness gracious me...

...when I was in my mid to late twenties I was a little party animal. I went to nightclubs, well, nightly. Amazingly, I usually made my way into work, as well. However, if I was off from work the following day, I'd usually head over to freaky and fun "After Hours" parties at different people's humble abodes.

Many of these nights are quite fuzzy memories for me. Niether warm fuzzies, nor cold pricklies. Just a blur. I remember these nights being full of outrageous conversations, even more outrageous sights, and genuine outlandishness and nastiness.

I remember the live DJ set up in someone's living room, spinning the tunes in a Jockstrap.

I remember searching for a restroom, opening a door to see two guys having completely nude hardcore sex while others in the bedroom just sat around watching...only then did I discover the restroom next door where I overheard the following exchange between two shirtless guys:

"So...where's your boyfriend?"

(Opening the bedroom door)

"That's him on the bottom...hi, honey...having fun?"

"Grunt, moan, oh yeah!"

Yes, many interesting "After Hours" events still trickle through my mind. I don't regret the experience of going to them in the slightest. I was a Southern Baptist angel, prior to these life-changing, mind-altering parties.

Yes, I enjoyed the excess.

This past weekend, I was hanging with some friends. They ended up getting a call / invite to an "After Hours" party at someone's house. Was I in? Well, it's been a good five years since I had been to one of these wild events.

You betcher sweet ass I was in.

Once we arrived, I see roughly 15 people trying their best to dance to the stereo thumping with gay vocal house anthems. The ecstacy had obvious taken hold of these kids and they were having a "gay ol' time".

I was, too. Reliving my wild days, it was fun to watch these early twenty-somethings. Well, until they stripped off their shirts.

Holy shit! When did 20-year-olds learn that they needed to work out and have trim, toned, hot bods? Nobody shared this with me when I was that age. I guess Mtv has educated the youth of today, that they best get some style and hot bods, or else. The propaganda obviously works. These boys were a visual feast and emotional orgasm to watch. Delicious.

Then, it happened...reality took hold.

Damn...I'm 35-years-old. While my clothes looked fierce (I love my Diesel "Rookie Rooster" t-shirt) and my hair was a nice spikey euro-mohawk, my body looks like mashed potatoes (Ida Ho'an, I suppose).

What the hell was I doing at these kids' "After Hours"?

With my best friend passed out on the chaise lounge, I began to get down on myself, when I wanted to be going down on one of these tasty little nuggests of Asian / Latin / Almond-skinned sexiness.

Was that going to happen? Hell, no.

I did sit there and discuss my "issues" with the sweetest guy. He just happened to be the host of the party. He was my saving grace for my sanity.

Why did I keep calling him Oscar, when his name was OLIVER?

(God, I'm an ass.)

Why I'm all "hung up" on you...

2005-10-14T11:08:00.000-04:00

It hasn't been officially released, yet. But, thanks to Google, I've got it.

I have just downloaded the "Stuart Price Extended Remix" of Madonna's newest single from her "Confessions on a Dancefloor" album, which will be released later this year.

The song is titled, "Hung up".

The genius of Madge is that she knows how to please her fans. She's always on the cutting edge and she does this effortlessly by borrowing ideas from society, life, and others and manages to put everything in a blender. The smoothie that pours out is always flavorful, unique, and ever-so satisfying.

"Hung up" is no exception.

Pouring Agnetha, Benny, Bjorn, and Frida (otherwise known as ABBA, nitwit) into the undertones of the song makes me say "Gimmie Gimmie Gimmie" to my local Virgin Megastore. I do believe that this is one of those CDs that I might have to make the trek to Virgin at midnight on the release date.

It's just that good.

As Madonna always is.

Combining Madonna's newest "Confessions" and the movie version of "RENT" next month...well, November of 2006 is going to be a shit-kicker and I'm going to be a happy fat sprite.

It looks like the unoriginal beginnings of the new millenium are being pushed behind us. Some excitment in the entertainment world is finally returning.

Thanks, Madonna.

Now you know why I will always be devoted to you.

Why am I a train wreck?

2005-10-12T12:05:00.000-04:00

I don't know if it's the pending change of the seasons, but October is always a time of huge and drastic life changes for me. Sometimes producing big happy changes and sometimes big ball-busting changes.

In the past, during the month of October, I have:

Been terminated from my long-time employer (only to be reinstated two weeks later)
Began a five-year relationship with an asshole boyfriend who liked to have a career as a drag queen and adulteror
Split up with two boyfriends
Moved to new jobs within said company that had terminated me

So, October is a mixed bag, but always "eventful" for me. I both welcome the month with open arms and at the same time fear what metaphoric Halloween horrors might be waiting to scare me.

October 2005 has already been quite a roller-coaster ride...with much more to come.

Twelve days into the month and here's what's happened:

My boyfriend has gone through much grief when his sister's family was injured in one of the bombings in Bali
My current "boss" has announced he is leaving for a new role
I've made a new, close friend

Fearing the unknown outcome, here are some big events that remain:

Beny's Political Asylum court date next week. You know, the date that an INS Judge determines whether I get to keep my partner in this country...
An interview for a new role with the branch of my large company that I have wanted to be a part of since childhood. They are a creative bunch, and millions will experience their creativity for years.

So as you can see, I'm elated and utterly terrified. A train wreck.

Why, I believe this month should be called, Shocktober.

Why is it so promising?

2005-10-11T09:03:00.000-04:00

My new favorite show is on tonight.

Commander in Chief.

Geena Davis has done a wonderful job playing an amazingly strong, human, compassionate, and genuine "President of the United States".

If only life imitated art...for realsies.

We could use someone like her character, Mackenzie Allen, in the White House, like yesterday.

Just like President Allen, ABC is surprising people with their most recent change to this show. While the show is already a success with television audiences and critics, ABC has decided to bring in Steven Bochco as one of the show's producers. Steven Bochco is responsible for 'NYPD Blue' and some other shows.

Why mess with success?

Hopefully, the show will keep running on it's same intricately crafted cylinders...

...along with my other favorite new show...

Invasion.

This show is odd in a 'Lost' way, but not as over the top when it comes to plopping oddities in the viewer's lap. I mean, polar bears in the jungle?

I'm lost.

I gave up on that particular show about five or six episodes into the first season...long before they discovered the metal hatch.

Invasion on the other hand is slightly predictable, but has some interesting characters that are intertwined in conspiracy and life-changing alien posession.

What surprises me most about this show is that one of the producers and writers is Shaun Cassidy. The Hardy Boy has made it into the big leagues.

Of course, if I had written and created such a show, I'm sure it never would see the light of day. But, if I was a teen heart-throb in the 1970's like Shaun Cassidy...well, I guess my project would get a green light.

Ain't Hollywood funny?

Anyway...if you haven't checked out these two new shows, please do. They are showing promise.

Now then...

...why is Desperate Housewives sucking this season?

Why? What's the point?

2005-10-04T08:59:00.000-04:00

WARNING: Not my usual "fluffy" self today.

My partner, Beny, dealt with some rough news last night from his homeland, Indonesia.

My role as hubby...support him and console him during the challenging blow that he was dealing with...

...here's the story:

For those of you that don't watch the news or keep up with world events, you might not know about this.

A few days ago, there were two suicide bombings that took place at two seperate resorts in the tourist/resort area of Bali, Indonesia. One bomb was detonated at an outdoor beachside restaurant in the Jimaran Resort. The other inside a restaurant at the Kuta Resort.

Naturally, these bombs were part of a planned attack by moronic Islamic extremists. The attacks were designed to kill the many Australian, New Zeland, and Eurpoean tourists that frequent this resort area.

These bombings come on the third anniversary of the huge bombing that killed approximately 200 people in a crowded nightclub in Bali.

So, that's the news.

Why was Beny so upset? The news got worse...on a personal level.

Sunday evening was one of Beny's sister's birthday. Beny called her over and over throughout the day to wish her a "Happy Birthday". When she wouldn't answer her cell phone, Beny was pretty confused and concerned.

So, he called his Mother, who also did not answer her cell phone. Sensing something was "wrong", he didn't know what to do.

He kept calling and calling, until it was too late in the evening and he had to go to bed.

Last night, he resumed his phone calls to his sister.

Last night, she answered the phone. However, she couldn't hear him.

To celebrate her birthday, Beny's sister and her husband and kids (ages 4 and 7) decided to take a "getaway" vacation away from their hometown in Surabaya.

Their destination? You guessed it...Bali.

Where were they around 8pm for dinner when one of those assholes decided to blow themselves up in the name of Allah? You guessed it, again...the restaurant at the Kuta Resort.

Here is an innocent family of four having a birthday dinner in a beautiful resort town, suddenly engulfed in chaos as a selfish idiot mother fucker decides to stroll FOUR METERS from their table and blow his dumb shit self into pieces so he can get to heaven as a Martyr.

The news was devastating.

But, like I said...Beny's sister answered the phone. Unfortunately, she kept screaming, "I can't hear you!" and one of Beny's other sisters did most of the communicating as she sat beside their injured sibling.

The "birthday girl" is in the hospital with severely damaged hearing. She's alive.

The husband had four pieces of metal/shrapnel embedded in his skin. Three were removed. One, still deep in his stomach/side. His hearing is also severely damaged. He's alive.

The children. Also alive.

Thankfully, Mister "I'll get 88 Virgins and then wish I had a whore in heaven" wasn't succesful in taking these lives. However, he was successful in killing and injuring many others.

The doctors say that Beny's family members SHOULD regain most of their hearing in about three months.

So that's the story.

Why do we live in such a world?

Why am I so scared?

2005-09-30T11:15:00.000-04:00

I was up too late last night.

Surprisingly, I don't feel rotten today. It's a miracle that I didn't wake up in my normal hangover haze.

However, I am very weak. Physically, not emotionally.

After work, I'm heading to Halloween Horror Nights: Tales of Terror at Universal Orlando. Beny and I had a great time at this event last year and I'm really jazzed to go tonight.

What's going to make it extra fun (I hope), is that we are taking Jeanny to this and she's already terrified. It's a whole fear of the unknown thing for her, plus her fear of scarey movies. She has no idea what to expect. I'm certain that she's going to be terrified.

I'll get to exercise my Shadenfruede (laughing at the misfortune of others).

But, why am I so scared?

It's not really that I'm scared. It's more like I'm afraid...or worried. Worried that I'm going to be so fatigued after lack of sleep that I'm not going to enjoy my full money value of the event tonight.

Then again, once I get some liquor in me at Universal Orlando, I should be a-ok.

Why, I just can't wait.

Why RENT?

2005-09-27T09:46:00.000-04:00

I've been a RENT-head long before I even first saw the show this past July in NYC.

RENT's music is extremely brilliant, thanks to the amazingly talented Jonathan Larson. He's no longer with us, but his music lives on.

Prior to my seeing RENT in July, I merely plopped in the CD and drove around singing those catchy songs. I never really pondered the emotion, soul, and meanings of many of them (not to mention the cleverness) until I finally saw the show live on stage (...and yes, Frenchie Davis was in my cast.)

The show really hit home.

Relevant to me as a gay man. As an occasionally "Kate Moss sniffer" (wink). As an employee of a company that makes me always wonder, "How am I gonna pay...this year's rent, next year's rent...?"

I laughed at the show when I saw it. I was wowed by the energy. I desperately held back tears as Angel died, Maureen and Joanne had their scuffle, and Mimi and Mark struggled to admit their love for each other -- despite their secret.

But, my biggest RENT moment came to me in the privacy of my home.

No one home at the condo. I pulled out the piano bench. Plopped open the RENT sheet music. I hammered out many tunes as I had always done before.

Then, I slowed down one of the faster songs and began to weep as I sang...
"And when you're living in America, at the end of the millenium, you're what you own..."

I don't own very much...and it's not really about having it all anyway. I'd be happy with a car that has functioning air-conditioning all of the time instead of 40% of the time.

It wasn't that verse that made me weep for the superficialness of it. Nor was it the vapid and shallow fact I just mentioned about my worldly possessions.

What really tore me up was when I kept tickling the ivories and delved deeper into the song...

...Dying in America
At the end of the millenium

We're dying in America
To come into our own
And when you're dying in America
At the end of the millenium
You're not alone

I'm not alone

I'm not alone

Jonathan Larson wrote those lyrics at roughly the same age as I am now. He knew the awkward times and challenges of being a struggling thirty-something. When I played and sang those lyrics slowly...almost as a ballad...everything hit me hard.

I realized that as much as I struggle, as much as I feel like I'm going through this life all by my lonesome, I'm not alone.

I have amazingly caring (albeit sometimes over-caring) parental units. I've got a loving partner who takes damn good care of me. I have dear friends who have moved across the country. Heck, I've even friends in other countries who I am certain still cherish me as much as I cherish them.

I looked over at my dog, Chopstick, as I was realizing that life isn't hopeless. His confused and adoring eyes looking up at me as I wept.

I'm surrounded by love.

Why, I could see it in his eyes.

Side note: The film version of RENT comes out in theaters in November 23rd. Give thanks this Thanksgiving and GO SEE IT!

Another side note: The soundtrack for the film is released TODAY...I can't wait to buy my copy after work!

Why am I young again?

2005-09-23T17:07:00.000-04:00

It's a fact.

I'm passing my prime with the all of the typical tell-tale signs.

The gut is getting bigger. The "Secretarial Spread" has reached my posterior. My mind is already fading...at 34! My friends are dwindling, as our interests/maturity levels are skewing.

It's an interesting time.

However, I've been surprised by something the past week. I've actually made a new friend. She's breathing laughter and energy back into my life.

Her name is Jeanny. (She's actually my boyfriend's best friend of ten years.)

She's sweet, funny, and very compatible with my personality. She even commented to me yesterday that she thinks it's crazy that she's getting along better with me than she is with Beny.

What has been a joy for me, is that I'm able to try to show off Orlando and the things that make me satisfied living in O-town. She's enjoying it.

In the next few weeks I plan to take her to go on the "trippy" old-people 'Winter Park Scenic Boat Tour' and to the gorgeous 'Bok Tower and Gardens'.

However, this weekend I get to pop her "Disney Cherry". This girl has never been inside of a Disney theme park -- or ANY theme park for that matter. I'm going to get to witness a "first-timer" and I know that it will make me feel young again.

Life is good.

Why, I might just take her to Universal Studios, too.

Why monorail?

2005-09-09T10:12:00.000-04:00

Last weekend I had a fantastic time hanging out with my life-long best friend, Donna. We met at Downtown Disney late in the day out behind the House of Blues.

We popped inside for a Long Island and went back outside to the fun bouncy metal chairs along Lake Buena Vista.

Soaking in the witty banter and the relaxing view of Saratoga Springs, along with slurping on the Long Island....well, I was tremendously relaxed and happy.

The happiness continued as we drove up to 'the Wedding Pavilion' and walked along the shore of the Seaven Seas Lagoon over to the Polynesian Resort -- home to the 'Lapu Lapu' -- a luscious drink for lushes served in a hollowed out pineapple. Completely yummy.

Happily bouncing our way over to the monorail, we headed to the Contemporary Resort, which isn't all that "contemporary", but I hear that Disney is working on that with a current refurbishment.

We bellied up to the bar at the "Outer Rim" lounge. It's a name that I am sure was coined to invoke some sort of Saturn/Space/Contemporary feel, but to me always provides a chuckle as I think of the nastiest of sex acts.

'Deeg' the coolest "older" lady bartender that always remembers me everytime I visit and took great care of me and Donna with some excellent conversation and excellent drinks. (We won't mention the omissions from the bill -- whoops!)

We boarded the monorail for the return trip back to the Polynesian, where we went out by th quiet pool and chit-chatted some more. Watching the Brazilian boys in their late-teens and minimal bathing suits in the pool -- a delightful bonus.

The next evening, Donna dropped by my house and told me how wonderful the night was on our monorail ride/drinkfest. She described as "therapuetic". I couldn't agree more.

There is nothing better than spending time enjoying the company of one of your cherished friends. They help you work through your issues, inspire you to follow your dreams, and keep you laughing.

I'm hoping that this weekend, Donna finds time to either do a re-run of last weekend, or something completely different. Regardless of what happens, I am so happy and blessed to have her in my life. She's been there through all of my horrible relationships, parental unit worries, financial woes, and more.

Why can't all "friends" be like that?

Why chaos?

2005-09-02T11:44:00.000-04:00

Nobody can explain WHY things have turned so ugly as a result of Hurricane Katrina. The aftermath of this storm is now ripping at the moral fiber of our country (if it still exists).

Our "President" is still wearing his damn smirk and spouting John Wayne quotes for the press...meanwhile he (and his buddies) are smirking all the way to the bank as the entire country shells out more for their oil companies.

Meanwhile, back in N'Awlins...people are dying and just as the Mayor of the Crescent City and the Govenor of Louisiana have said...the Feds are sitting on their asses and aren't doing enough FAST ENOUGH.

The race card has been issued. I'll never buy this argument. Believe me. I care about these people the same as I did for the Asians in the Tsunami. These are PEOPLE and they are living in HELL.

Some of them are looting. Well, according to the press, the 'black ones' are looting, the 'white ones' are finding supplies for survival.

Regardless...it IS chaos.

Luckily, for my family...all my family members in New Orleans metro have been found safe and alive. Their homes -- moderately damaged, but still standing and flood-free. I thank God for this.

For a dead-on reaction to everything that is occurring, please visit Linda Sharp's blog, and see WHY she is one of the most thoughtful and insightful people around.

You'll see why...
http://dontgetmestarted-lindasharp.typepad.com/

Why Katrina?

2005-09-01T13:14:00.000-04:00

I have learned that my Aunt & Uncle's house in Mandeville is "ok".

My four cousin's homes in the New Orleans area: three "ok", one "uncertain".

One of my cousin's eldest daughter "missing".

When I think of all the petty whining I did awhile back regarding my "rocky road", my trials seemed huge. What the citizens of the "New Atlantis" are experiencing is incomprehensible, depressing, and severe.

CARE International is my personal charity organization of choice, but at this time I URGE for each and every one of us to make a contribution to either the American Red Cross OR the United Way.

Why, it's the least you could do to help.

Why Twister?

2005-08-24T14:26:00.000-04:00

Put your left hand on a 'green circle' (wink, Lindy) and your right foot on blue.

If you've been following along in your Playbill, you'll know that I've been suffering a melodramatic second act recently in my personal life.

(For those of you that are sick of hearing about it, scroll down with that little wheelie-thingy on your mouse until you see the jumbo TWISTER below.)

I'll spare all of the tedious details...except for those that really need -- or will care -- to know WHY?

Hi! Cliff Notes here, giving you the most brief wrap-up to the Lifetime Movie that is tripaway2day:

Still not 100% certain, but it appears that evil twin Franky was plotting and lying to destroy my relationship with Beny. Why? I guess I will never know.
Beny...while he certainly was cheating...has been forgiven. (At least 63% forgiven)
Evil twin Franky has moved out and denied ever telling me any of the alleged "lies" when he confronted on speakerphone.
Beny's packed suitcase and belongings were still sitting on the bedroom floor this morning.
Saw the greenlitlady (http://www.greenlitlindy.blogspot.com/) at the Savoy the night that led up to the final resolution of this drama. He looks completely suave. At least I think he did...I was blitzed.

Hopefully, things have been resolved. Hope can mean nothing, however, when faith has been lessened.

The REAL topic of discussion for this posting was to be...

TWISTER

I'm talkin' the ride at Universal Orlando.

(Or the ride that isn't really a ride, but challenges the theme park visitor to "Ride it Out".)

I know I fooled you all earlier in this entry with the talk of the Twister game we all played growing up (and some of us still play when schnockered on Long Islands)...that was nothing more than a gratuitous plug.

A little history here:

Twister "Ride it Out" is a spectacualr set-piece of special effects and pyrotechnics at Universal Orlando.
Set to open in the late 1990's to replace the stale Ghostbusters show, Twister "Ride it Out" had a delayed (for sensitivity) opening due to three devastating tornadoes that ripped through Central Florida a few weeks prior to the Grand Opening of this attraction.
The attraction also boasts the world's only five-story tall indoor whilwind of tornadic activity.
Oh...and there's a flying cow on strings, too.

The attraction (based on the movie) quickly became one of my favorite experiences in Orlando.

Can't put my finger on it.

Don't know why.

I am simply fascinated by it. Almost as fascinated as I was by the Dolphin Dicks at Sea World (that one was for you, Will).

My poor ex-friend Sonya used to get me completely high on weed at her house and I'd make us pile in the car on a quick marathon sprint (thank God for moving sidewalks) to Twister. I love being overloaded on weed and watching all of the destruction unfold in front of my eyes. It was quite literally a "whoa!" moment for me.

The food at the Monster's Cafe across the street was almost as amazing.

So, here we are...a new age of theme parks and attractions. Does this Twister still hold up for me? Would it be as fun sober? Would it be as fun after drinking a Pina Colada with 151?

I did some testing on my own last Saturday and I can still give a resounding continued endorsement for this attraction. It's one of the most unique attraction experiences around.

Bill Paxton's hilariously horrendous delivery in the preshow was a solid hoot once I was drunk.

So...I enjoyed the attraction so much again, that I decided to go online and purchase the movie on DVD. Why? Well, probably because as much as I like the attraction, it will be leaving us soon to that attraction heaven in the sky. I needed to keep Twister alive in my soul forever. (Note: I don't have any concrete info or rumors to back up the statement that the attraction is closing -- it was my gut instinct that kept telling me so.)

NBC bought Universal...they added Fear Factor Live! The bastardization of quality creative attractions has begun.

Hopefully, my dear sweet Twister can "Ride it Out" a few more years. Heck, even the devastating hurricanes didn't remove this attraction "due to sensitivty".

Why does "ER: Live!" sound like a contender?

Why 'Rocky Road'?

2005-08-15T10:51:00.000-04:00

I've always been a big fan of 'Cheesecake' Ice Cream. Lately, however, I've been sampling a heaping pile of 'Rocky Road'.

My relationship with Beny has been in a really 'bad place' for the past few weeks.

Beny has been utilizing his 'Creamery' to turn my heart into 'Cold Stone'. Or perhaps it's his sneaking and cheating that has morphed his little plastic heart into one of 'Cold Stone'.

Whatever the case, I've recieved some info that he's been unfaitful on a regular basis.

The 'Rocky Road' got even rockier yesterday, as he decided to book us into the Ritz-Carlton Spa for a Ruby Red Grapefruit massage treatment. This was to be his nice little surprise for me, but was a blantent attempt to mask the guilt and infidelity he thought I knew nothing about.

I enjoyed the spa experience, but please don't tell him, k?

It was the 'after party' that sucked. Licking my pride off of the waffle cone, I let on to him that I had been worried about his recent exploits...without him knowing that I knew there were many more than he had ever shared with me.

Basically, I laid down "the law". I demanded that he stop his current path or that he will take the relationship down the 'Rocky Road' with a 'no outlet' sign.

I also told him that if he continued to do what he is doing, then I will be forced to play the 'lets see who can cheat on the other most' game...and that the relationship will surely be non-existent.

I urged him to consider his actions and the fact that I have lost respect in him and that he needs to re-earn my respect.

It's when he blames his behavior on MY behavior during the first TWO WEEKS of our FOUR YEAR relationship that I balked at him...

..."That's a flimsy and pathetic excuse that I no longer accept as viable. I have already pleaded for your forgiveness for my actions during that time, and you have supposedly forgiven me. If that's the case, you can't use that as an argument anymore. Dismissed."

Then I alerted him that his actions are recent and that they neglect the emotional investment that we have shared for four years. This is where I have the upper-hand.

I told him that I wasn't sure if I could forgive him. I also told him that if he keeps up his current "covert activites"...well, he better simply be careful. I don't know what my reaction would be if I discover more of this crap, but if I do, I'm going to turn on my most brutal attacks.

Retaliation can feel good. In situations like this, it feels horrible.

I only pray that he really thinks about what his actions are doing to the relationship. I also pray that his stone cold heart warms up to the fact that I love him. It's up to him at this point to make the change.

I've been "used" by too many of my ex's for comfort, security, etc. to allow another to use me again.

I've told him this from the beginning of our relationship. If he wants to use an action from the beginning of our relationship to justify his lack of ability to control his cock and hole...then, I will remind him of the fact that I told him from the beginning that I will not allow anyone to 'use' me ever agian.

He will be the one who will feel used. Especially when he realizes what he is throwing away.

Why do I trust anyone?

Why am I "overloaded"?

2005-08-10T12:03:00.000-04:00

Brief update:

Things are fine with my friendship between me and Franky.

Beny and I are doing okay, but haven't seen very much of each other recently due to our schedules.

Had a wild night at my good friend Donna's semi-formal office party...didn't arrive home until 4:30pm. Very odd and fun evening, ending by the pool at the Wyndham Palace Resort & Spa.

Work is a complete nightmare right now. I guess there are too many deliverables coming up on the Senior Leadership team. I am being tasked with documenting all projects and creating a timeline to show how everything is hitting and overlapping all at the same time.

Needless to say, I'm in Excel Spreadsheet hell.

Why did I upgrade to XP?

Why am I such a jerk?

2005-08-02T08:46:00.000-04:00

Well, I never really thought I was a jerk. My boyfriend thinks otherwise and confirmed it last night when he told me to my face that I am "such an asshole and a jerk". I wasn't sure why he was telling me this. I couldn't recall being an asshole or a jerk.

Here's the whole story, leading up to my jerky assholiness:

Apparently, last Sunday, I was having a great day getting wasted with my best friend, Donna. We...well, what did we do? It's a blur.

Oh yeah, I remember...

...We were hanging out at the house, drinking, watching the replay of the Space Shuttle launch (in HD) with the volume down, and listening to my Shirley Bassey Remix CD...you know, Moonraker, Diamonds Are Forever, etc.

Good stuff.

We were having a great time until we got a "craving" for some food. We had to get out of the house and do so promptly. (It's amazing how quickly moods can shift when blitzed.)

We pile into the cool driving machine -- the 1996 Gold Staurn SL2 with the hurricane damage -- and start barreling down the GreenWay towards Disney.

Not knowing where to eat, I had a brilliant idea! Earl of Sandwich!

If you've never had one of these delicious sandwiches at Downtown Disney's Marketplace...go...go now!

Donna and I both landed on "the Frenchy". It's yummy ham with creamy brie and some dijonaise-type sauce. Piled on ciabatta bread. Heaven. Pair that with some Miss Vickie's Salt-and-Vinegar Potato Chips and a mini bottle of red wine. My taste buds were exploding. We finished the meal with a white chocolate macadamia nut cookie. Holy shit...that thing was incredible.

Hmmm...almost sounds like we had the "munchies", doesn't it?

After the meal of a lifetime (Thanks, Earl!), we piled back in the HurricaneCharlieMobile and tootled down to the bar at Planet Hollywood.

Mistake. Furiously downing our Long Islands to get out of that "downer", we were back on the road and heading for the quick trip to the Walt Disney World Dolphin Hotel.

$7 to self park!? Screw that!

We parked at Fantasia Gardens Mini-Golf and hoofed it over to the Dolphin.

Sitting down at the ultra-hip Todd English's Bluezoo, we were ready to continue this day of giddiness. I ordered us an 'Incredible Hulk'. It's the blue Hypnotiq with Hennessey. That green monster kicked our butts. The $25 bill for the two drinks almost enraged me to clothes-ripping proportions. Thanks, Mr. English...we're sure to be back. *Cough*

Then we danced and drove (love my BPM on xm) back to the condo.

The Indonesians were home. That would be Beny (my boyfriend) and Franky (my torturer). I think we were all having fun. It's more of a blur. I do remember drinking red Sangria with little chunks of diced apple. I do remember Beny going to bed early. I also recall sitting outside and drunkenly talking with Franky.

I didn't remember being a jerk. Apparently, I was.

Apparently, I always become a jerk when I get too drunk.

I seem to mouth off like a loose cannon, "shooting salad" all over the place.

It's a Dirty Shame.

Naturally, I don't remember telling Franky that he should be grateful for living rent-free in my condo. A comment that I myself don't even agree with! I chose to open my home to him and I want for him to be able to rebuild his life. I want to be a part of that. Why? Because he is a rare gem and a genuinely compassionate person and deserves it. I really care about Franky. Friends like him are hard to find.

With my sharp tongue, I have ruined the friendship...I think.

Franky thinks I'm a jerk. Beny thinks I'm a jerk. I guess I am a jerk.

What I know for certain, is that I want Franky to continue living with me and Beny. But, I've removed the "comfort-level" that he shared by living with us. I made him feel like shit by yanking the rug out from under his feet. Beny has told me that Franky is now shopping for apartments. Something Franky should not need to do.

I feel horrible about this...especially because I didn't mean it.

There were many factors contributing to my foolish dialogue. I'm deeply concerned that I have lost a dear friend. Someone that I had hoped to have around for a long time.

Why can't I just get drunk and have fun without ruining it for everyone?

Why can't I just bite my tongue? Ouch.

Why am I such a jerk?

Why the Wonderful World of Will?

2005-08-01T16:18:00.000-04:00

He's one of my ex's.

He's one of my all-time best memories.

He brought me so much happiness and so much sadness.

He's Will.

He used to be "Wil" with one "l", but he's opened his "world" up to the rest of us.

Enter the blog of the ex-boyfriend that I still love in some strange way deep down in my heart.

Enter the blog of the guy who disappeared from my life for ten years, only for me to reunite with him (via computer and telephone) for the past few months.

Enter the blog of this amazing guy in Portland.

WHY don't I just provide the link?
http://wonderfulworldofwill.blogspot.com/

Why I hate "Hidden Mickeys"

2005-07-27T09:35:00.000-04:00

A little history for those not "in the know"...

The Disney official history goes like this: Hidden Mickeys started in the late 1980's in Epcot as an inside joke among the Imagineers. Hiding Mickey around Walt Disney World was just plain fun. Because of the popularity of Hidden Mickeys, Imagineers are encouraged to place them in new construction.

Some more memorable Hidden Mickeys include:

In the riverboat scene near the end of the Splash Mountain ride is the cloud Hidden Mickey (lying on his back) on the wall to the right.
In the large mural at the Maelstrom loading dock in the Norway pavilion is a small viking ship full of "brave vikings". Look closely...one viking is wearing Mickey Mouse Ears on his head.
The full body image of Mickey painted in the mural (in the green “broccoli-like” tissue) above the entrance to Body Wars at Epcot.

Hidden Mickeys are fun to spot. So much so, that there are now books that exist that can help you locate them throughout the Disney theme parks.

When I served my time as a personal "slaveboy" for celebrities and VIPs as a Walt Disney World VIP Tour Guide, I enjoyed occasionally pointing out some of these Hidden Mickeys to my tours and introducing them to the "secret" world of Hidden Mickeys.

It's the whole...I like you...now let me let you into our "inner-circle". It was always a big-win while on tour.

However, now-a-days, the phenomena has gotten extremely out of hand.

People now swear they see Hidden Mickeys all over the place. Some of these so-called Hidden Mickeys are patently ridiculous.

You think that the three rust stains from a stantion post being moved around is a Hidden Mickey? Um, no.

Let me give some example via links...

Here's a REAL Hidden Mickey: http://www.mouseplanet.com/tokyo/edwards/ceiling_hidden_mickey_edwards.jpg

That one is from Tokyo Disneyland and is quite intentional from the Disney Imagineers.

Now here's one of the absurd ones: http://mousesurplus.com/allears/viewtopic.php?t=46&sid=13345c15cfb772a5f34e0a83e1d54a25

Do you see anything remotely similar to the REAL Hidden Mickey? Me neither. This is wear my pissed-off-itude motor begins revving.

I see pots and kitchen utensils, but no "Big Cheese". Not even a Cheese Grater!

But, Hidden Mickey Hunters pull this crap all of the time.

"Oh! I found a Hidden Mickey!"

"Look, there's one!"

Um, no...that cactus doesn't even look like Mickey Mouse. If you are on drugs, please share them. The Imagineers didn't plan that one and it isn't legitimate. Get a life and stop trying so damn hard to find a freaking Mickey Mouse in everything you see. No, that turd you just flushed looked nothing like a cartoon mouse. Please seek help.

Wait...I'm wrong. I confesss. The cucumber on your plate really IS a Hidden Mickey (or a not so hidden one). You see, Disney actually IS gentically mutating vegetables at Epcot's "the Land" pavilion to grow in the traditional Mickey shape. No lie!

This is getting out of hand.

As much as I love my sweet nephew, Kyle, and my Sister-In-Law...these two are the worst offenders in the "I see one! I found one!" Hidden Mickey hunt.

I've gotten to the point where I have turned down trips to the theme parks with them mainly because I didn't want to be the "expert" to approve or reject their fucked-up Hidden Mickey submissions.

Me: "Can't we just enjoy the Jungle Cruise and listen to the finely crafted spiel rather than interrupt the "Jungle Skipper" by declaring that you've found another one?" Pretty please.

This is a phenomenon that I no longer enjoy. The cute little "wink" that the Imagineers started in the 1980's has become something I abhore.

"There are two more Hidden Mickeys: On the Poster opposite the control room (above the stairs) in the loading area ("Baltimore Gun Club") there are 3 cannon balls on the right and on the left forming an upside-down Mickey"

See them for yourself at the link below, and you will also see, WHY I SIMPLY CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!

http://sm.dlpfan.org/pics/fm_gunclub.jpg

Why am I "high"?

2005-07-26T13:10:00.000-04:00

Recreational substances can be fun.

Don't argue with me -- just go with me. I've had a great time being "high" in the past.

Luckily, my NEW "high" has been defined. "High definition", I guess one could say.

I've been on an LSD "acid trip" for the past three days as I Ooo-and-Ahh over my new high definition television. I've watched everything from a tour of Naples (Italy, not Florida), a "Stormchaser" IMAX film, something about beavers (the animal, not the organ), to even Nascar races and Boxing.

To steal the McDonald's phrase: I'm lovin' it.

This morning I had the opportunity to get ready for work while watching the LIVE Space Shuttle launch preparations in High Definition.

Simply stunning.

(I should have been more proactive and purchased the Digital Video Recorder so I could've watched the actual launch in HD later this evening.)

I did, however, have the opportunity to step outside my office at 10:39am and watch the lift-off with my own stereoscopic eyes. But, it wasn't nearly as high definition as my HDTV.

WHY do I forsee myself forgoing LIVE fireworks displays this New Year's Eve to stay home and watch the festivities around the world on my TV? Well, the answer: because I'm already looking forward to seeing that beautiful shit!

Speaking of beautiful shit...okay, no shit is actually beautiful...just go with me -- again.

This guy, Michael Kelley, has a great blog called, "The Skinny Tie Report". The beautiful shit on his site in the past few days is a magnificent trip down memory lane for me. He tackles the earth-shaping technologies of Colorforms, Shrinky Dinks, and Lite Brite. It's a must see for anyone in their early to mid thirties!

Here's a link: http://www.skinnytie.blogspot.com/

Make sure you see the hilarious and skillfully Photoshopped "City of Orlando" Colorforms set (including Livstrong Bracelets!! Eeeeeek!)

betamike IS my new hero.

Also peachy on the web is the high definition mind of Miss Hill. That's Brian Hill. He's taking jabs on all things Peachy and not-so-Peachy. Find out why he's no peach: http://www.existencemedia.typepad.com/

Finally, the SHARPest in high definition clarity when it comes to observing our fucked-up world, the hilarious and accurate Linda Sharp.

She's an accomplished author, often hailed as the new Erma Bombeck.

Now, I'm not too sure if she actually likes this title, but I'm sure she'd enjoy knowing that my Mom shoved my face into many a Bombeck article clipped and posted on our fridge. Often an article humorously detailing the challenges of cleaning up piss splatters on the toilet or dealing with the stupidity of loving spouses or the joys of raising kids without skinning them alive.

Miss Linda can be read here: http://dontgetmestarted-lindasharp.typepad.com/

The vivid images on my HDTV and the vividly sharp creative friends I have are truly a blessing to me. No longer "in a funk" like I was a week ago, I have realized that I have many things to be happy about. I have clever and caring friends with inspiring blogs, a kick-ass piece of technology in my living room, and certainty that today...

...I'm high on life.

Why, I am fine, thank you.

Why am I in this state? Chapter 2

2005-07-19T13:09:00.000-04:00

This time, I am talking about Florida.

After visiting New York City for a mere five days, I have concluded that Florida is no longer "for me".

I'm working a job that no longer has any excitement or appeal. Maybe it is that the company that I work for seems lackluster and zest-less these days.

Maybe I am finally growing up and the "magic" has disappeared or dispersed to beaurocracy and bullshit.

Orlando has become predictable beyond belief.

While I admire the vast array of "Downtown Redevelopment" now under construction in downtown Orlando, it's simply not enough to give me a sense of "belonging".

When I hear of the feable attempts at constructing a mass-transit rail system in the Central Florida area, I get disgusted.

When I think about our "Performing Arts" community, I can't figure out why things are so lackluster. There's so much great talent in this town, however, there simply isn't a budget for it, a community want for it, or dedicated state-of-the-art space for it. These poor talents are left to give their all for many tepid responses.

Wake up Orlando! Wake up Florida!

This state has no cohesion. Our Govenor...don't get me started. It's a state that is oversaturated and has no identity and Dubba's bother ain't helpin' matters.

New York City...while oversaturated...has an identity and it has made me feel alive in this lifeless town.

Yes, I do not have a sense of belonging living here anymore. My heart and soul that once belong to making "magic" now belongs to New York City.

Will I move there and feel more lonely than ever before? Will I get lost in the even more massive crowd? Will I be in financial ruin? Will I be able to afford to keep up with fashion? Will I be able to shell out $200 clams to see the latest and greatest on Broadway? Will I find "real" people in New York?

As usual, I never have the answers, but I make up for that with questions.

I'm feeling it. I'm hearing "New York City Boy" in my head 24/7.

So, what I'm discovering is that I'm craving a new chapter for my life. This tired old tale has become mundane and boring...as predictable as Orlando itself.

I have recently been evaluating the pros and cons of selling my condo and moving to NYC vs. renting out my condo and taking out a new mortgage in NYC.

I have been posting for a wide variety of jobs in NYC. Surely I'm not fully qualified to do any of them, but that's what happens when you devote your life to a theme park. But, as unpredictable as life is...as unpredictable as NYC is...I have hope that something interesting can come out of all of this.

I know that there's some middle-manager up there somewhere that will look at my resume and think, "That's a very unique set of qualifications."

Then NYC might give me a chance to show...

...why I am so unique.

Why am I in this "state"?

2005-07-11T09:48:00.000-04:00

No. Not Florida. I'll have to save my rant on this whacked-out state of Florida for another day.

I'm referring to my current "emotional" state.

I've been feeling weak, emotional, and vulnerable.

I'm not sure what "place" or "state" I am in right now. This uncertainty has left me feeling very out-of-sorts. I'm not even sure who I actually am these past few days.

I think I owe my recent vacation to a portion of this "state". That city so nice they named it twice showed me that there is much more out there than living in this artifical city of Orlando. A city that is leaving me to feel as artifical as it truly is. A city lacking in "real-ness". A city full of people that think they are ever-so-metropolitan, but in actuality...they are Lakelanders with nicer clothing.

The void was filled for me in NYC. Now that I have returned, the void has reopened.

But, the void has grown even deeper...approaching Grand Canyon proportions when it comes to the status of my relationship with Beny.

There are some terrible dynamics occuring. The frequency of the infidelity (from both sides) and the divide between us is growing so rapidly that I can't keep up. I'm feeling emotionally bankrupt. I am feeling "wrong" for not caring. I'm feeling "right" on the off-occasions when I do "care".

The honeymoon is over. The threesomes have lead to "secrets". I have uncovered at least one secret per week for the last three weeks.

That's not a good track record.

Naturally, I have secrets of my own.

Franky has moved in to our house (condo). I'm happy about it. He seems to be in an emotional state where I was 3 1/2 years ago. Single, lonely, and looking for "someone to come home to". Well, now I'm in the odd position of being that "someone". I'm also in the odd position of enjoying it. Especially since Beny is never really there for me to "come home to" anymore. I'm lucky if he looks up from the laptop to even recognize my arrival.

But, I can't commit to Franky. Hello. I'm in a relationship. But, I want to commit to him. I really like him. I'm hesitant, however, because I haven't known him long enough to know what I would be getting into with him.

I want to fill his void(s) (Yes...that void, too. Pervert.)

But, the challenge is that I genuinely love Beny so much. We've been through so much. We've worked so hard to make our relationship work. It's been a good run. I can't see my relationship with him ever going away. There's a feeling in me that regardless of whatever unconventional situations we place ourselves in together (or even seperately), we will be there for each other.

I'm pretty convinced of that. I know that we are meant to be a "couple", until "death do us part". I know this. I feel this. I believe this.

So, I should feel full of life. I should feel full of love. But, I don't. I can't.

There's some dynamic occuring that is causing me to question everything: my existence, my job, my relationship, my motives, my desires, etc. Why is this happening to me? Why am I being such a whiny pussy?

My cup...overflowing with emotion.

My "state"...confused and as blank as a Will Smith "I, Robot".

Have Asian nanites corrupted my system? Have I taken a "back seat" to my life in the past few months, allowing everything to veer off in the wrong direction?

I'm not sure.

I'm sure that even with all of this uncertainty...I'm calm. Only time and open communication can solve these issues.

And, the dialogue must start within myself. It's only then can I discover...

...why I feel this way.

Why, oh why?

2005-07-07T14:04:00.000-04:00

New York City was simply magnificent.

I truly didn't want to leave and I was fully exhausted from go-go-going non-stop for five days.

Did lots of great shopping.

Had the best burger of my life ($12) at Porter's in Chelsea.

Stumbled back to the hotel drunk numerous times and still managed to wake up early enough to get movin' all over again.

The cast of "Rent" was stellar with strong and control voices. They moved me to tears...as I expected them to do. Perhaps it was Jonathan Larson's brilliance shining through that truly touched my soul as I was enveloped in the Bohemian way of life?

La Vie Boheme!

La Vie Mr. Larson...a talented life snuffed out way too soon.

Saw the "Naked Cowboy" in Times Square...and managed to remain flaccid. If it were the "Naked Chinese Zheng Player" instead...the egg roll might have been in a Cialis state.

Went out to a screamingly good time at the enormous and incredible "The Rambles at The Park" (located at 10th Ave & W. 17th St.) and managed to down plenty of "Long Islands" AND see the "Long Island" of a stripper on the bar and another in the men's room. Good times. (Bonus for having smoking areas in the bar! No other club had I entered had this as an option.)

Low points:

The staff at the Empire State Building--NEVER AGAIN!
The Flatiron Building under "wraps" for refurbishment...ruining my photo op.
Making the mistake of not going back for another amazing Porter's burger.
Not being able to afford/score tickets to any of the other shows I was hoping to see. If you must know, these include: The Lion King, Wicked, Avenue Q, The 29th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee.
The limited operation of the subway during the 4th of July weekend. I expected the trains to be slightly more frequent.

So, the overall opinion of NYC and my trip there...

...I applied for a position with ABC News, with the hopes of moving into this amazing universe that is New York City. I simply couldn't get enough of it.

People say that I would get sick of living there...I'm not so sure. I think I've always had some New York or even L.A. in me somewhere. Most likely because I've been a television junkie all of my life.

But, the 'Sex and the City' girls make the best points for living and existing in New York City...so, I'll finish with their amazing words:

Samantha: I'm always surprised when anyone leaves New York. I mean, where do they go?

Miranda: The real world?

Samantha: A homeless man showed me his dick on the way here. It doesn't get any realer than that.

-----------------------------------------------

Carrie: New York City is all about sex. People getting it, people trying to get it, people who can't get it. No wonder the city never sleeps. It's too busy trying to get laid.

-----------------------------------------------

Big: I'm tired of New York.

Carrie: If you're tired, you take a napa, you don't move to Napa.

-----------------------------------------------

Miranda: Why do I think living in Manhattan is so fantastic?

Carrie: Because it is.

Why am I spreadin' the news?

2005-06-24T11:49:00.000-04:00

Because I'm leaving next Thursday...for New York City.

And, why is it that I can never say "New York City" without actually hearing those cowboys from the PACE Picante Sauce commercials? That's some smart advertising!

Anyway, back to me...and well, Beny, too...we're taking our first "real" trip together ever and have decided on New York City (fucking cowboys...STOP IT!) mainly because it's Beny's biggest desire to see NYC (that's better) while he's here in America.

Then, last night, Beny reveals that the big driving factor for him to see NYC isn't to see NYC at all. No, he wants to go to NYC to buy shoes.

You heard me correctly...shoes!

So, I'm spending a mountain of change so that he can buy shoes!

It's all good, however...as I haven't been to NYC (God, it's so much better saying NYC) since I was in the seventh or eighth grade. That was a church mission trip. That's right...I used to go on mission trips! So, needless to say, I enjoyed NYC, but didn't have the opportunity to delve into the seediness of NYC.

You can "Betcher bottom dollar..." that I'll be having some real experiences in NYC this time.

Nightclubs, Broadway Shows, Bathhouses, Sex Clubs, and Shoe-Shopping.

Can't wait. Can't wait. Can't wait. Can't wait. CAN wait.

Hopefully, I have an event-filled trip report to share. Until then, say a prayer fo me, okay? I'm a little nervous about flying on July 4th, but since I'm going AWAY from NYC that day, I should be okay...I hope.

I think it's going to be beautiful flying over the East Coast of the USA on the Fourth of July, viewing fireworks from the air.

This has been a long time comming for me. Thanks to all of you for letting me express my excitement! Of course, if you know who I have to blow to get into see Wicked, please email me. And, if you know who I need to blow to score some blow, email me with that, too. Kidding, of course. (Or am I?)

All of this travel on a shoestring budget makes me wonder:

Why not Vegas?

Why Zoloft?

2005-06-20T10:44:00.000-04:00

My typical answer to virtually any "feel good" pharmaceutical: Why not?

I've been taking Zoloft off-and-on for the past few weeks. It's a Selective Seratonin Reuptake Inhibitor (SSRI), which is supposed to make depressed people a little bit happier.

Is it working? Well, considering the trembling and the racing thoughts are a good thing, it's working. If strange "vibes" creep in and out of my head are also a good thing, it's working. Throw in a minor case of nausea, yawning, and the ability to get shit done quickly and it's quite an interesting way to feel a bit happier.

Now, this past weekend, I didn't take the little blue pill. I ended up in a funk that was in the lower doldrums of funkiness. I ended up sleeping in day long siestas for most of the day on Saturday and Sunday.

I remember that during my previously single days (pre-Beny), I would get into this same funk. Sleeping became a full-time job and I aligned with going out to clubs to snag me a man. The difference now is that I've got a man, and when I'm sleeping all the time, my "supervisor" doesn't like it too much, ya know?

But, what's a 34-year-old washed up fag to do? I'm not getting younger. I never made my "goal" to have my body in shape for Gay Days. I'm not too crazy about my dead-end job.

So, this morning I resumed taking my Zoloft.

I really don't think the Zoloft is going to help. It's time for this tripaway2day dude to stop whining and relying on SSRI devices and do something to better himself.

Just like Celine Dion, it's "A New Day" for me. (Of course, I'd be alot happier if my "New Day" aligned more closely with hers, but that'll never happen.)

I'm going to do it. I'm going to be motivated. I'm going to officially start working out...replacing my nightly nightcaps with exercise. Eating better with smaller portions.

The new goal for "A New Day", is to look better...not just for Gay Day, but for myself. Hopefully, this will help me to not waste my days away relying on little blue pills, vodka, sleep marathons, or any other excuse to be "happy".

It's all up to me.

I've tried to jump start this routine before and failed.

Why do Personal Trainers cost so damn much?

Why java?

2005-06-15T10:36:00.000-04:00

Who knew coffee at work could be so much fun? Well, many people obviously do. But, none of them seem to have nearly as much fun as I, once I down my caffine.

I arrive semi-promptly at 8:30am every day. For some odd reason, my PC takes a whopping 15 minutes to boot-up. (Could it be all of my "cookies"?)

During the 15 minutes of startup time, I head to the "kitchen" to pour my cup of coffee. Four packets of Sweet & Low and two French Vanilla CoffeMate creamers...because I'm sure you were just dying to know.

Another five minutes for me to wait for my coffee to cool a wee bit.

8:45am-8:50am...cruising through the politically correct nonsense in my Outlook Inbox and slurping away at my brew.

Then it happens...I'm all caught up on eamils and the coffee kicks in.

Smart-assiness begins to ooze from my every pore and I begin to harass my co-workers on whatever inane topic I can come up with. Today it was "I got it at Ross".

A new Ross opened up near my home in Hunter's Crick and in typical Ross fashion (and Kissimmee proximity fashion) the place has already been trashed by those folks who are moving up from Miami/down from NYC.

I'm not naming the demographic here, but...these people cause me to be fRICAN out at how my "Desperate Wives" surburbia is quickly being converted to a TeleNovella ala Univision.

Speaking of which, Disney has agreed to allow a latin remake of their "Desperate Houswives" for the Latin market...provided they air the original ABC episodes first.

Well, as you can see...the coffee has kept me from sticking to one coherent thought this morning...so allow me to travel to the next rift in my space-time continuum...

..."A Dirty Shame".

This is John Waters' latest film, and it's a fabulous take on the many facets of the Right-wing/Left-wing devide that is happing in our country today. The Right-wingers are cast as "Neuters": Those 'normal' people who think that sex is horrible and nasty. The Left-wingers declare, "Let's get sexin'!"

It's an ode to Janet Jackson's tit and every goofy sexual fetish ever invented.

To hear "Neuter Mardge" exclaim, "It's not safe out there! People are shaving their crotches as we speak. There's pubic hair in the air!"...well, you know you've got a film that is brilliant and somehow overlooked by the "Academy".

The film is now available on DVD and I proudly picked up my NC-17 copy yesterday as it went on sale.

Topic-travelling again...

...my poor, sweet Beny has just been offered the job as a Spa Manager with Mandara Spa here in Orlando (Portofino Bay at Universal and later this fall at the Walt Disney World Swan and Dolphin Resort).

I'm so happy for him...

...BUT...

...the INS has declined his work authorization which expires mid-July.

So, he has the job of his dreams lined up and can't take it until his lawyer straightens shit out with the INS.

Should I be jumping up and down celebrating, or crying here? What's a husband to do?

Why does life have to be so shitty to good people, like Beny?

Why Karma?

2005-06-10T11:01:00.000-04:00

What comes around, goes around. Right?

After visiting Orlando's newest gay neighborhood bar, named Karma, I am a firm believer in karma.

This place has numerous nuances of one of my original early-90s stomping grounds, named Uncle Walt's.

Uncle Walt's was a "neighborhood" gay bar in the middle of Orlando's International Drive. An area lacking in the neighborhood department, but overflowing in the tourism department.

One of my favorite features of Uncle Walt's (besides the name, which is a wink to Mr. Disney) was the giant piece of grafitti-esque "art" that lowered from vertical to horizontal by motors and chains to become the stage for the drag queens. This mechanism always wow-ed me.

The place had the typical gay neighborhood bar vibe. I always love that. Because getting my "drink on" can be serious business. Why do I need to guzzle Long Islands in a place where self absorbed 20-somethings might spill my Tea? The answer: I don't. That was the appeal of Uncle Walt's, for me anyway. I loved Uncle Walt's for the delight of getting Tea-totaled and laughing it up with those cherished friends.

Uncle Walt's is no more. It's gone to join the real Uncle Walt up in heaven.

But, what comes around, goes around. Right?

Karma is eerily familiar. Despite sitting close to the magnificent Cafe Tu Tu Tango and Don Pablo's and despite the obvious low budget decor, I love the place. I also love the fact that it's on my way home from work.

Karma should prove to be a good thing. I'll be nice to it. Hopefully, it will be nice to me.

Now, if I could get reaquianted with cherished friends from my past...

Jeff Lindberg (http://www.greenlitlindy.blogspot.com/)
Michael Kelly (http://www.skinnytie.blogspot.com/)

...then I'd be convinced that the karma is really working.

Luckily, I've been made aware of their blogs and I can read what these two unique guys are up to day-in and day-out. I recommend reading them for yourself.

It's interesting to me that as you "grow-up" and discover yourself in your 20s (and even your 30s), many people cross your path. Some of them make an impact and they don't even know it or appreciate it. Some of them were so close to being "key players", but for some reason or another...they fall short.

Sometimes they simply disappear with no explanation.

I meet people all of the time that I find intelligent, witty, or unique. Acquaintances that I would enjoy attempting to "convert" to friends. However, and without explanation, these acquaintances remain as such.

It always makes me wonder...

...why do we all put up such barriors between us?

Is it karma?

Why do friendships simply dissolve?

Why roller-coasters?

2005-06-01T14:13:00.000-04:00

Anybody that knows me, also knows that I'm a big theme park junkie. I love the theme parks for the pure "escapism" factor. Lord knows that our daily lives are filled with all sorts of trials and tribulations that make a surreal escape fantastic, and sorely needed.

Last weekend, I had the opportunity to head to Tampa with the strict mission of riding Busch Gardens newest roller-coaster, Sheikra.

This is a new "diving coaster" that races you up a 200 foot tall lift hill, only to aim you facedown a 90 degree drop. It's an intense thrill and I was chomping at the bit to give it a whirl.

Beny and I arrived in Tampa Sunday afternoon and checked into our somewhat decent hotel, the Seraton Suites Tampa Airport.

Within minutes of arriving, Beny's evil twin Franky arrived. I am a complete roller-coaster of emotions around Franky. I desire him. He is intelligent. He's attractive. He's funny. He's...well, he's Franky.

Franky whisked us away to go to dinner.

After a few moments of trying to figure out what restaurant we actually agreed upon, we ended up at a charming place called, Ceviche. This is another 'tapas' restaurant in Tampa...something Orlando needs desperately.

We had a lovely dinner, however, I felt awkward. I'm not even sure why I felt awkward. Perhaps it was the freezing temperature of the place. Maybe Beny, Franky, and I have all reached the point in getting to know each other where we don't have much else to say or discover? I wasn't feeling like opening up too much. I often become more of a reactionary conversationalist than an conversation-starter.

I'm in the queue line for quite a big ride.

I'm sure the fact that Franky was sitting directly across from me didn't help matters, either. I found myself staring at him consistantly and then fearing that Beny would "catch on" to my gaze.

It was time for me to go smoke.

I stepped outside and reflected on my surroundings...Tampa does have a few hidden spots that are quite lovely.

I must be stepping into the roller-coaster train.

Back in the restaurant after my "time-out", Beny and Franky started talking about me in Indonesian. When you are the topic of a conversation in another language and the discussion ends in laughter...well, it t'ain't fun.

After downing three glasses of Sangria, I was felling better about the entire Cheviche dining experience.

The main lift hill.

We drove back to the hotel to change our clothes.

While Beny was taking his shower, Franky and I gave each other the "come and get it" smirk. We kissed each other (no tongue) a couple of times and I started feeling nervous and elated.

Plunging down the first drop was quite a rush of adrenalyn and excitement.

Abandoning the dog in the "no pets allowed" hotel was challenging. My poor Chopstick needs a play mate. Hopefully he didn't cry too much as "Mommy and Daddy and Object of Desire" closed the hotel room door.

Off we travelled to "CitySide". I'm not sure I understand why this place is Franky's nightly hang-out. However, after two Long Islands, and hanging out with some of Franky's hilarious and insane friends, I began to understand the appeal.

Climbing back up the next hill now.

The friends (Will and Merrill) were an absolute treat. Will is the same guy that came to Orlando for La Nouba (see my last entry), but Merrill was an instant friend for me. He was such an engaging personality with a great mind and humor. Oh, and he was slutty, too.

Highlights of the insane CitySide portion of the evening? Watching Merrill question one of the bar's partrons about her being of legal age to even be in the establishment and miraculously somehow getting the phone number to the boy that she was with.

The other highlight was laughing in histarics and making eye-contact with Franky as he was laughing, too. I love watching him laugh. His friends supply ample opportunities to see him do so.

Weee! We're going down another drop.

Leaving Cityside, we headed to "the Male Room". What a first-class establishment...ahem! It was Karaoke night.

Now, I never thought I'd enjoy Karaoke night, but with this laugh-factory crew...Beny and I had a great time. I had such a good time that I can only remember small tidbits:

The skinny, young Asian boy.
The less-attractive Asian guy.
Will singing a Karaoke song and dedicating it to me and Beny...that's swwweeett!
Me tipping Will a $1 bill in his undies as he was singing.
Me heading directly to the urinal and laughing while I pissed because I was a drunken mess and Will was still audible in the background.
The "Trailer Trash Barbie" that Merrill and I both worshipped as she sang her Karaoke song. Complete with stars on her pantyhose!
Some other 'strangers' joining all of us at our table. Who were these guys?
Me slipping into oblivion.

Yes. It was a fun night.

I thought I drove back to the hotel, but later discovered that there was no way that I could have done so.

The next morning was hell. A tremendous hangover headache and fatigue.

This must be the helix portion of the ride. I sure was spinning!

We had all made plans to go to Busch Gardens the next day. After hours of pulling everyone out of the previous night and into the day ahead, we arrived at Busch Gardens at approximately 2pm.

Sweltering heat. Memorial Day. Hangover fatigue.

I wasn't doing too well.

Sheikra...2 hour wait...hardly an option.

After two free beers I felt as good as I could. We all giggled as we discussed the previous night's insanity.

What was even crazier were the stories of what happened after the Male Room.

Will went to the Rainbow (a gay bathouse) and had intercourse with six guys. So he says.

Merrill, went home and had the acosted girl's friend join him. Apparently, a let-down that didn't look nearly as good in the morning hours.

As we bunny-hopped the final small hills, the ride was a fun one.

Beny and I pulled into the station at home around 9pm ready for another typical week together.

We were exhausted, and had a very fun time.

I asked Beny about Merrill and he told me that he "liked him". I knew it. I could tell that Beny was/is into this guy.

The fun of the weekend is over now.

The fun is over now.

If you have noticed, my fun didn't seem to revolve around Beny. Am I done with him? Do I feel that he's already interested in others like Merrill? Does he realize that I'm interested in Franky?

Regardless of what the future holds for me and Beny, I will try my best to keep it together. There is no doubt that he is the best boyfriend that anyone could ever have. I hope that neither of us do anything that we will regret and fuck up our relationship. Escaping to theme parks without him would never be the same for me.

I think I need to adapt the creative escapes of theme parks into my relationship. Instill creativity in my romance.

Does this lead to wild threesomes with Franky, Beny, and me? Beny, Merrill, and me? Or will it turn even sleazier?

Why do I hope that it doesn't?